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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

In one hour

36 replies

Asti4ever · 06/07/2022 12:30

I tell my husband i want a divorce. I fear him getting angry. But kids out of the House for 2 nights so now is the day. Wish me luck!!!

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Original poster
Asti4ever · 13/07/2022 07:16

But he had the money before marriage - so he says morally it is wrong for me to take it?

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Original poster
Asti4ever · 13/07/2022 07:17

And i Think i agree.. just dont want to either be evil or stupid..

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Girlintheframe · 13/07/2022 07:17

Definitely take the money. Take everything your entitled too. You've no idea what the future holds and you need to financially protect yourself and your DD.

Even more so if you are loosing your job!

Original poster
Asti4ever · 13/07/2022 07:17

I am loosing my job.

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PennyMordor · 13/07/2022 07:24

Sorry if you’ve already answered this, I’m having trouble posting: how long have you been married for? And are you in England?

DFOD · 13/07/2022 07:32

Do not be drawn into discussions on money and the “morality” of anything.

There is a legal system that has worked out each and every one of these nuances time and time again and there is an existing established legal framework to manage them.

Don’t talk to him. Talk to your solicitor and keep your eyes on the road ahead.

Notice how swiftly he as moved on from inappropriately emotionally dumping on your child with his victim face on to getting stuck into twisting the financials.

He is v manipulative. Don’t be coerced. Just do everything that the lawyer says - in black and white on paper.

I hope you are able to comfort and protect your DD and tell her that his behaviour to her was OOO. That’s your most important asset - her emotional stability through this time.

Original poster
Asti4ever · 13/07/2022 07:38

Married 12 years . Not in England.
Thank you so much for your words, you are very comforting. And yes i need to stop talking with him about this.

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Original poster
Asti4ever · 13/07/2022 07:40

And yes dd is ok. It is a shit summer holiday for her, but she sees her friends and we stay locally to Them and School .
Im going out with a friend now and when i come back in a few hours, she is up. We Will talk more then.

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Original poster
Asti4ever · 13/07/2022 13:50

Signed and paid deposit and rent for flat today. Hopefully SAS fly on saturday, then he Will be off for a week. Then one week togwther and my dd and myself is off for a week. Then we move.

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DFOD · 13/07/2022 16:18

Good for you. You have it sorted. Just deal with the couple of hours ahead of you and you will come through.

Original poster
Asti4ever · 14/07/2022 01:01

He turn her against me. Saying things Said in private, to her.
Tomorrow we had plans with MY Family at our House , and he changed it to "wife not Well, she need space, dd and me coming to see you". 3 days ago another of my Family was here to get my car While i was in meeting and they talked for Half an hour. I could see Them. He says its his family too after so many years and i know he is right . But i still hate it.
I pray SAS fly on saturday.

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