Could my coworker like me? Or am I reading into it too much?

[tiffanyblues]

So I started at my job around 6 months ago, and since then I've gotten along with everyone pretty well, and we're quite close. A male coworker, who I'm friendly with but wouldn't go as far to say we're close, often notices new pieces of clothing I wear. Even when others don't.

I got a new pair of shoes and he commented on them, again, no one else noticed that day. I sorted my closet and found a light coat I haven't worn in a long time, perfect for summer showers, and when I wore it he asked was it new I explained yes, technically new to others but not to me and just laughed it off. Again, no one else commented. And when I got a new pair of jeans it was the first thing new noticed which threw me off, and he said he liked them.
I have female coworkers who I'm very close friends with who have gone the whole day without noticing these things, or I'd have to say "oh, I got new jeans" and then they'd comment, so for him to repeatedly notice these things, unprompted, could it mean anything?

To start, I've noticed textbook signs, I've looked his way and noticed he was looking at me, and he quickly looks away. However, lately when this has happened he's held my gaze and he does this "gentleman's nod" with me, we go back and forth a few times (jokingly) and then he asks how I am. He doesn't do this with anyone else, that I've noticed anyway.

Every morning when I get into work he says "good morning, First name Last name", someone noticed this and asked why, he just said "I can't say her first name without saying her last name too".
One day when I went into the office he pulled his chair up beside me with his arms behind his back, and gave me a kids toy him and his friends won, but he knew I liked the character and so he kept it all weekend to give to me.
Then there's other things, for a while we had a back and forth as something wound up on my desk that I didn't want there so I gave it to him and he kept finding ways to put it back on my desk, but not be obvious. If he talks to a coworker I sit beside, his feet and torso are entirely in my direction even when I'm not in the conversation. When I speak to him he leans in more.

Am I reading into this too much? Any advice?

I think I would be a bit creeped out by how he's acting @tiffanyblues .

If you're thinking of getting involved with him I wouldn't, not least because you will still have to see him at work when/if you split up. Don't sh*t on your own doorstep.

He sounds a bit obsessed. DP likes me but would only notice new jeans or shoes if he'd seen a parcel being delivered

I think I would be a bit creeped out by how he's acting

I love MN. Comedy Gold.

Yes, it seems like he fancies you, OP. Only one way to find out.

Now you are about to get a deluge of people telling you that if a man likes you he will make it obvious and ask you out (because all men are the same).

Or you could believe a man when I tell you that we can be just as shy and unsure as women and healthy relationships are founded on good communication.

Ask him out.

I think I would be a bit creeped out by how he's acting

I love MN. Comedy Gold.

I just personally wouldn't like all that commenting on my clothing, I'd find it too much/focussed on my appearance. Once would be bad enough, let alone several times.

And the sitting angling himself towards me too, and getting in my personal space with the toy thing. He's too full on.

Either way, never shag workmates.

I want to know what is a 'gentleman's nod'?

Definitely sounds like he's very into you. Or he just really likes fashion!

I feel like I've just read a letter from a teen magazine problem page. How old are you OP?

For what it's worth, and as PP have stated, it's never a good idea to mix relationships and work. Be polite and professional and focus on the job you're being paid to do rather than this colleague

Poor bloke. Shows perfectly acceptable signs of flirting and next thing the MN Mafia have him pegged as an obsessive creep. This is the trouble....not every bloke is a pervert or stalker and there has to be some way to communicate attraction to someone you like without fear of a disciplinary or needing to write to Daddy with a marriage proposal!

Yes, he likes you OP. Assuming neither of you are already taken, it's just down to you to decide how you feel about him.

As for not dating at work - sure, but hundreds of people do. If you think you can do so without it impacting your career, why not.

Don't sht on your own doorstep.*

I don't really understand this mentality. Surely at work is a valid place to meet someone? I've known people who met at work and went on to get married.

Obviously I'm not suggesting OP should jump into bed with the guy, and I agree that casual sex with a co-worker is messy, but it can work if things are taken slow.

OP it does sound like he likes you, and I think the thing with the toy sounds really sweet! You could just ask him out yourself, or if you're not feeling brave enough for that maybe just casually ask him if he wants to grab some lunch and see where that goes?

I was getting compliments from a guy at work. Just ‘that’s a nice dress’ and stuff like that. Not loads but every so often. No other indicator or anything and I didn’t think anything of it. Just that he was being nice. Found out quite recently that he fancies me. He’s definitely thinking about you but it’s up to you whether you reciprocate that or not.

I don't really understand this mentality. Surely at work is a valid place to meet someone?

Nor me. I’m married to a colleague. Where I work it’s quite common.

This is the trouble....not every bloke is a pervert or stalker and there has to be some way to communicate attraction to someone you like without fear of a disciplinary or needing to write to Daddy with a marriage proposal!

@FluffingMarvellous They can make conversation with us as fellow humans rather than commenting on what we're wearing etc.

I suppose a lot of people meet partners through work. It just runs a risk of being awkward if things don't work out.

Why is complimenting somebody on how they look not making conversation with them as a human? He also clearly listens about her interests too, to have kept the character figure for her that he thinks she'd like...

How much does he like fashion ? Does he notice others clothes ? How is the behaviour with others, compared to you ?

I think those are all signs he likes you OP, he sounds quite sweet and very attentive.

He sounds just like Daniel Cleaver in Bridget Jones' Diary.

How the hell did we find boyfriends / girlfriends in the days before social media?!
We had to resort to talking to people: complimenting them or asking them out / asking if they could walk you home (DH!!) whereas now that would be the signs of a creep - he has personal space issues
stalker - he wants to find out where you live psychopath - he notices everything and probably has a wall in his house covered in photos of your different outfits

But... also do NOT shag a co-worker - that is a v bad idea