Photographs, married life, what do I do with them?!

[Notsoniftyfifty]

So I have what seems like 4 million photos in various boxes that I never sorted properly when I was married.

I’m now divorced, and I still haven’t sorted them, and I’m tired of having it on my to do list!

What might be the easiest way to approach it? I have one young son, and I’d like him to have some of them, but otherwise I’m not that bothered about them. I guess it still means I’ve got to go through them all, which feels like it might be a bit heavy going.

Anyone been there, done it?

This is the hardest thing ever. I can't face touching any photos. I just keep stuffing them into places I don't have to look at them. I don't think photos are natural - we aren't meant to have all these images to deal with. Do you have an attic? Put them up there and forget them.

Ha, that’s what I’ve done for years 😂
I’ve really got to sort them out - if it was just me, I’d probably have a bonfire in the garden but I do want my son to have some memories of his mum and dad. Trouble is, I can’t do that unless I go through the whole bloody lot can I 🤦‍♀️

As someone with divorced parents, I love having photos to look through still from when I was young. I would keep them in a box for him to sort in the future if he wants to.

I did boxes for my son of places and times growing up of us as a family and then boxes for myself of ones I wanted to keep. I got rid of loads that had no people in - scenery etc.

You've got a kid? Box 'em all up safely and let him sort them out in a couple of decades.

My parents split up when I was small. A few years before he died, my Dad gave me boxes of photos. He gave me my early childhood back to me and it means so much.

You don't have to look at them. Just put them by for him.

I'd let your son know you have them and he is free to look/sort whenever he wants, just keep them aside? I know that's easier said than done depending on storage space in your house.

Storage space permitting, I'd say one big box. Leave them in whatever they're in, but if you can, scribble 'Auntie Sarah's wedding' 'Centreparcs 2015' etc on the envelope/album/box, to help subsequent detective work by your dc. Then just neatly put them in that box & shove it in the attic or whatever.

Forget about it until you next move house. If dc is an adult by then, hand over the box & let them do what they like with the contents.

If you don't have the storage space, devote a rainy afternoon to yeeting anything blurry, or that doesn't include people you can identify?

I have a small canvas print still in the polythene that I ordered just before the split
He wants to keep them all for ds
It doesn't feel right putting them in the bin so I'm sure there's space enough in the loft for them
I think my wedding dress, guest book etc will be going in the bin though 🙄

Label it 'box for son' and it's sorted.. off your to do list

I've kept them all, including our dating photos and wedding album, as I want our children to see the truth that we were very much in love and having fun and that they were conceived in happy times. Ex has told them a very different story.

I've kept my wedding dress in case DD wants to wear it for her wedding.

They're all in boxes in the loft.

Thanks everyone for the replies. It’s really helpful reading through what others have done. I feel a bit more spurred on now x

I've kept all mine for ds including our wedding album, they are part of his history.

I hope it's still relevant but my sister also had her wedding and other couple photos for years after the divorce until she desided to go through with it. She looked through them all- actually we both did as it was way quicker to sort them out together, and digitized the best/most meaningful ones (I believe 30 or so total). Then had a smartshow 3d slideshows made out of them and got rid of the printed copies. This was also done due to her general wish to declutter but having things in digital is also more convenient imo. The pictures that were gone right after the first look were the ones with people we don't maintain contact/can't recognize at all and low quaity or blurry ones.

Donate your wedding dress! I donated mine to a charity that makes angel dresses for still born babies, you also get to see the little dresses they make out of it.

Yeah, I still have all of ours too - mostly in the attic. I can't look at them still, 5 years on as it's too painful a reminder of how happy we were. But our wedding day happened and it was a brilliant day and I want our children to see that. My dress is also in the attic as I don't know what to do with it. I loved it too much to get rid and can't bear the thought of anyone else wearing it. It's really tough isn't it.

I'd keep some but I wouldn't keep them all. Think about how many of this sort of thing you would want. My mum gave me one album that covers my whole childhood and I feel that was about the right amount for me.

It must seem overwhelming to go through them, but once you start you might find it's not as hard as you thought. Half of them will be as pp said, boring, blurry, duplicates, of random people you've forgotten, etc.

My husband still has to go through a large box that we brought from his father's house after he died a few years ago.

First run will probably be to get rid of any pictures that are random scenery etc that mean nothing to him. My PILs were avid photographers of every flower and view when they went on their many holidays, so they will go. The main ones to keep will be those with family members in, or pictures of homes/local area over the years that could be interesting to the next generation. When I look through my mum's photos I love the pictures that show the neighbourhood and other areas of the town in decades gone by.