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Grandmother won’t make any effort
6

Cheryl22x · 28/06/2022 18:36

I need some advice on this please as it is driving me crazy.

My baby’s grandmother wont come and visit her grand child at my house where my parents are but this is where my baby lives, she also wont go to her to sons house to visit her either as she says my daughter won’t look at her if she comes to our houses. And the only way she will see her is at her house.
we never get any texts phonescalls nothing. Her son ( my daughters dad ) still goes over there to visit her and she never mentions one word about her. We are sick of telling her things and never getting the same effort back. So we are waiting and still nothing. I’ve told her that I would bring her over to see her and all she has to do is ask but never has!

the last time she did see her was 11 weeks ago. She’s never ever tried.


advice please.

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SmileyPiuPiu · 28/06/2022 19:13

she also wont go to her to sons house to visit her either as she says my daughter won’t look at her if she comes to our houses. I don't really understand this bit. But anyway, you've done all you can let it go but let grandma know you're willing for her to visit. Or maybe arrange to see her at a cafe?

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layladomino · 28/06/2022 19:13

Just live your life and don't worry about it. If Grandma isn't bothered about your child and doesn't particularly want a relationship with her, then why would you try to force that on either her or the baby? Grandparents aren't obliged to be close to their Grandchildren. Do you feel your baby is missing out in some way? Or do you feel offended that Grandma isn't gushing over her?

I never expected texts or phone calls from my Grandma either. She was lovely, really loving, but not of a generation that had to be constantly in touch. If you wanted to talk to her, you called her and she'd be thrilled to hear from you. It's fairly normal to do more of the running around with older people. As I think of all my older relatives / in laws, we visit them, they don't visit us.

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LittleOwl153 · 28/06/2022 19:32

Clearly she is an odd kind of lady given the comment about only looking at her at her house...

However - this is your baby's dad's mother I assume? Leave the hassle of her visiting or not to him. She knows because you've told her you'll visit if invited, and I assume she also k ow she's welcome at yours or baby's dad's when he has her. Beyond that drop the rope and move on with your life. Baby is not missing out because you can't force someone who is not that bothered about her to come and see her.

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Aquamarine1029 · 28/06/2022 19:35

It's her loss, op. Stop worrying about it and don't bother chasing her. Anyone who's that much of a pain in the arse and that apathetic won't add any value to your child's life, anyway. I wouldn't waste another second of emotional energy on this.

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Minimalme · 28/06/2022 19:46

Be thankful she isn't interested.

You dd has plenty of people in her life. This women sounds potentially harmful.

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Raspberryjam22 · 28/06/2022 19:51

I honestly don’t understand posts like this . If a child’s grandparent/ aunt/uncle/ whatever isn’t interested , why get upset and try to force it ? My DGC’s paternal grandparents aren’t interested . Their loss and DD shrugs and carries on .

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