I can't bring myself to actually talk to anyone in real life about this. Me and bf have been together 9 years we took a break 2 years ago but got back together. I can't bring myself to be intimate with him, even just kissing and hugging makes me uncomfortable. I've explained to him how I feel, I feel like I'm not giving him what he needs in a relationship. He says he understands but later makes jokes that kinda make me feel shitty. This is one of the reasons why we split because I dont want him to have a sexless life when I know he's always had a high sex drive. I admit I will only have sex with him if I've been drinking. I really do feel awful but he doesn't want to break up again. I'm so confused, any advice please?