Tell me to throw him back…

[Blackcatnofat]

Won't bore you with the details as I know what I need to do, just need some encouragement.

Short story - been seeing a guy for six months, both mid 50s. Definitely being breadcrumbed, texts are few and far between, dates once every two/three weeks instead of twice a week, no compliments, no phone calls - no interest really.

I know I should throw him back, but I'm just so bloody lonely sometimes, and can't bear to go back on the apps - been on and off for 12 years and still not found a good one

So please tell me I'm doing the right thing... TIA xx

Have you talked to him about it? Maybe you have different needs and it could be resolved, or maybe your needs are incompatible. Either way if you broach it with him you’ll get a good sense of whether he’s open to accommodating your needs or whether he argues back or isn’t capable etc.

sorry you’re feeling lonely

Throw him back.

You aren't happy as things are, and he clearly is, so it's not going to work. Sorry.

There's nothing lonelier than being undervalued by someone who's supposed to care about you. Sounds like he might have a couple of women on the go. He deserves to be ghosted....

Well he'd have turned into a Prince by now lovely. I suggest it may be more satisfying to walk away with your head held high and not a backward glance.

Build a life to deal with the loneliness and foster some interests. Join a book club, a choir, a church, a political party, a local thing like gardening verges, helping at a sanctuary or litter picking. Take a deep breath and book a cooking or watercolour week in Provence, go to the Summer Exhibition, Tate, join the Friends of the V&A.

Build yourself a life that is full and rich in interests. If a man doesn't come along, you will have a good life regardless. Any of those things may lead to introductions with real people who know people you know, doing stuff will give you stuff to talk about and interests to share and it may all work together to form a virtuous circle.

Walk away before you fall too deep.

Being on your own is better than being with the wrong person. Don't put too much pressure on having to go back to dating straight away. Dumping this guy doesn't mean you need to jump straight back onto the dating apps.

Yup, throw this one back.

Just in terms of putting you off-

I pity a woman who would put up with this.