Is this a fair division?

[FruitlesslyFruity]

Husband and wife who have one child who is 2.

Husband - self employed doing long days Mon-Fri, often starts at 7am and gets home around 5:30pm. Will also occasionally work half a day on the Saturday too but never does anything at home, no cooking, no grocery shopping, no washing up or laundry, never done a night waking with baby.

Wife - works 3 days per week 8am - 4:00pm but also does everything in both the home and with their child.

Personally I would feed the child early and have crackers and cheese every night for a few weeks until he cracked.

I'd expect him to share the load evenings and weekends when he's there. He can't just clock off because he's finished the office job. Not unless you get to clock off at the same time too OP, which of course you don't.

Before you had the baby, how much did he do then ?

So he gets home and eats his tea and puts his feet up and you're still going mopping the kitchen floor at 9pm? I think that's the key basically, one of you isn't sat idle and done for the day, while the other one is still at it. Not so much a checklist of who's jobs, but if they won't pitch in so you can both be done earlier and and spend some time together, that would not be working for me.

Up to them

No of course its not fair

Another day. Another doormat.

So what does he do from 5:30 until he gets home? Just sit about?

So he works 10.5 hours a day, five days a week and sometimes Saturday? So maybe 60 hours a week?

And you work 21 hours a week?

I work on the same "free time" idea, so once you've added in the hours you look after your DC, what are you left at? Basically once you're also at 60 hours a week with work + dc / house, everything over that gets split between you.

Presumably with a 2 year old you are on duty well before 7am and overnight too.
If it were me, I'd be counting my actual hours, and then stopping after the same number that he's done.
I thought the idea of early tea for the baby and cheese and crackers for you was a good one. Also, I'd probably stop doing his washing.
When you are calculating your hours, remember to include your travelling time like you included his, and only count your lunch break if you actually get to spend it eating lunch and chilling.
With this sort of set-up, it wouldn't surprise me if you were taking the financial hit of child care, loss of earnings and reduced pension.

He does less than he'd do if he was a single man, but he's actually a husband and father. Pathetic.