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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Name calling

6 replies

Amy44 · 24/06/2022 21:01

My husband says he's joking and I need to lighten up that's him and I need to accept it ...but he name calls me any time of day to my face and even on the phone , slut ,slag, hussy, wench, bingo wings, 2 Bellys, saddle bags, thunder thighs frumpy the list is endless I've asked on numerous occasions for him to stop and explained its knocking my confidence self esteem basically making me feel really bad about my self it's making me spend most of my days getting changed wearing coats cardigans and uncomfortable slimming suits under my clothes, it makes me feel sad and not good enough I'm a size 14 and I want to be confident with that I have had 4 children I'm not looking for compliments at all I just want this to go away but he won't stop , he expects me to be confident when out and about but how can I infront of strangers if that's what my husband thinks of me.
I have never ever commented on his physical appearance it's just never crossed my mind
because I love him , I know what he is doing is wrong but what can I do .

OP posts:
Littlebirdyouaresosweet · 24/06/2022 21:08

Start calling him Micro Man. Refer to his dick as a shrivelled parsnip...
Consider your future op. Do your dc hear all this?

AttilaTheMeerkat · 24/06/2022 21:27

He is verbally abusing you and your children are also being emotionally harmed as a result. It’s not their fault nor yours that he has decided to embark on his own private based war against you.

please contact Womens Aid here, you and your kids deserve better and a life free from
being abused. The only acceptable level of abuse in a relationship is none.

Sapphirensteel · 24/06/2022 21:35

What a vile man. I really hope your children don’t hear him.
You could give him an ultimatum- stop insulting me or leave. If he carries on get the locks changed while he’s at work.
Or you could insult him in a matter of fact way ( preferably without the dc present) “ What did you say ugly mug?” Hey little dick, have you seen this?” Pass the salt fat arse etc., See how he likes it.

BluebellField · 24/06/2022 21:39

Wtf? That's very far from normal. You do not deserve that. I would seriously be considering my relationship if my partner thought it okay to say these things to me.

KirstenBlest · 24/06/2022 23:20

says he's joking and I need to lighten up that's him and I need to accept it

It isn't a joke if you don't find it funny.
It is abuse

You don't love him, you love who you think he is, and he isn't that person.

Bunty55 · 24/06/2022 23:25

OP You know none of this is normal behaviour - that's why you posted. I have been with my partner for almost twenty years and he has never said any of those things to me in jest or in anger.. Why? Easy because they are horrible degrading comments designed to make you feel bad.
He sounds awful

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