OLD ghosting

[Daydreamscometrue]

Ghosted after meeting for a first date. Didn't see it coming since he'd been positive on the date and sent messages via watsap afterwards. Next day no contact and he hasn't been on watsap since the early hours so suspect he's uninstalled. Could be married? No reply on the app to a message either but suspect he's been on as the location changed.

Give me your stories to make me realise it's not just me!

Why do people get so invested after a first date…

No one here knows what he is up to but we do know that he isn’t interested. We don’t know why but you’ve had one date so move on.

It wasn't a case of being over invested. We'd arranged to meet the next day so it was plain rude.

It's very common in old om afraid.

It fees shit whenever it happens. It dents your ego but you do get hardened to it in a good way.
@BiscoffSundae asking for a bit of a chat about it doesn’t make someone over invested. Go and get a biscoff and be nice

It’s a first date, maybe he didn’t feel comfortable telling you he wasn’t interested, I probably wouldn’t after a first date I would just fade away, not everyone you meet for a first date is going to like you

Well best to get use to it as it’s going to happen loads on a first date it’s not like she’s known him months. They met once he wasn’t feeling it so has left it, why does he need to give a speech about no spark etc just take the hint

@BiscoffSundae you’re quite right but a bit of gentle support when someone is early days into OLD is nice to have. My friends and I had no experience of it when I started and it was a rollercoaster of emotions. Never hurts to just say “thanks but I’m not going to continue” rather than disappearing.

And I meant chat with us not him btw 😊

Actually I do think this is shit.

If he wasn't feeling it and just left it that's one thing. But they met. They carried on texting and arranged another date.

To then ghost is shit.

I've always been polite and said if I'm not feeling it. So it's perfectly possible to date and not be a dick.

Agree with this. None of us like sending the ‘not feeling it’ texts but it’s another human being on the other side of the interaction who deserves respect.
I wouldn’t automatically assume married, just cowardly

I'm generally pretty hardened to it to be fair. I totally understand the comments though.

I agree it's rude, would be nice to get at least thanks but not for me. You have to take what they say on a first date as a pinch of salt, they may seem like they like you and vice Versa but it dawns on them they are not interested or not sure enough to say anything.

I have been guilty of saying I'd like to see them again, when asked and put on the spot, when actually I've not had chance to think about it so soon, or ruin the date, I would always let them know the next day though, it's not nice to keep them in hope.
Not sure why he suggested another date if he had no intentions or he's very laid back.
No reply would be a deal breaker if they decide to pop back anyway.

Ahh OP this hurts. Happens to us all. One particular gem of mine, chatting for weeks, met, all good apparently until he went silent for days then sent me a txt clearly meant for another woman. Its shocking and harsh and it hurts but it is OLD and you do harden up to it. Ps... he is likely to be back.

Once you stop being surprised that lots of people don't have the same standards as you, re respect, and anything else, you'll feel a lot better. And you be a step closer to adulthood.

*you'll

Well, there’s your answer OP.
What a rude person thinks.
They’re out there.

I see ghosting as having a real lack of respect for yourself? It's like saying "you are not even going to notice or care if I just disappear".

But if you say something it does show respect for yourself and the other person?

That said I have probably ghosted thinking some one wouldn't care if they never heard from me again and maybe they did?