Ideal guy?

[Gem8701]

Ok so basically, I just wanna know what your idea of a perferct guy is? I am seeing one (have seen him for over a year now)but i am not in love with him, but he is such a good guy.

Perfect? Hmmm.

Cones round when summoned, gives me generous gifts, several hours of sex mainly focused on my pleasure, does a bit of housework or takes me out for dinner, then buggers off home when told to.

Good looking, hard working, funny and kind.
I couldn't be with someone that I wasn't really into. Hence why I'm a perma-single. Just can't be in a relationship for the sake of being in one.

Someone kind and caring, intelligent, funny, attractive, positive outlook on life.

Do looks come into it ? I'm not massiveley attracted to bf

But hes very good and treats me like a queen

He isn’t perfect if you aren’t in love with him. There are plenty of really nice guys out there, who you will feel more than what you do for this one. Let him go so that you can both find that somebody.

DP definitely isn’t what I would have ever described as my ideal before we met, my list would have looked very different. As such, I think that having set criteria can sometimes distract you from what’s actually important: somebody you just click with.

Nobody can tell you what comes into it for you. This is a preference. It's like asking us to tell you whether you should like raspberries or not; it's nothing to do with us, we can't advise you even if we want to and we really try, because we don't know how you feel.

The perfect partner (for us all) is the one we are drawn to, who meets our own individual relationship needs. Some people think looks are important, some don't. Some people think sex is important, some don't. If you're not attracted to him, you need to work out how important that is to you. It's all about you.

My boyfriend is the absolute love of my life, is he perfect? No. Is he perfect for me? Yes! Does he leave his boxers on the floor and does he seem oblivious to mess? Yes! But he's also the kindest, funniest, sweetest, handsome, most loving and affectionate man I've ever met. X

Mine is my ideal. But he wouldn't be for everyone I guess as we're all so different. Mine makes me belly laugh all the time. This is such a big deal to me. He's smart and kind. He's super affectionate and clearly adores me. He's also a complete tiger in bed 🤣. I fancied him when we met but as time goes on I find him even more handsome.

For me never mind what boxes they tick, how do I feel being with him?
I feel loved, desired, appreciated, wanted, listened to, and I also feel like I want to rip his clothes off-that's pretty perfect to me

If you aren't attracted to someone then wtf are you dating them?

You neef to assess why you think so lowly of yourself that you are dating someone you don't even fancy. At some point in life you obviously picked up the idea that women's desires (and probably, their needs too) don't matter.

You'll never find the perfect man if you go around dating anyone that looks good on paper irregardless of personal taste.

It's cliche yes, but you need to love yourself first.

Someone who has enough humbleness to know that their opinion on subjects not their expertise is never going to trump experts in that field.

That is an absolute basic.

I agree- looks may be important to some, not to others.
Looks isn't particularly important to me in a man, but I find intelligence sexy.
I am attracted to men who can cook well, or play a musical instrument, or ones who have no interest in sport.
Men who can laugh at themselves, who don't have big macho egos, and can make me laugh.
But overall it's a package, each individual -including women- have strengths and weaknesses.

I think this is called a male escort?

My boyfriend came straight over after work today to do my garden. He got here at 3 and he's still working in it after starting work at 7am. He's kind, compassionate, loyal (to everyone - not just me) and doesn't have an ego. He doesn't chase other women, he's not constantly on the lookout for other women - he doesn't even look twice when he's out with me. Is he good looking? Not in many women's eyes I don't imagine. But I think he's gorgeous. We talk bollocks and laugh at nonsense.

Is he perfect? Of course not. No one is and I wouldn't want someone who was 'perfect'. But he is perfect for me. We still see our respective friends obviously buy there's no one else I'd rather hang out with and I wouldn't change a thing about him. He says the same about me.

I don't really care about looks. I never have and I can't be doing with the arrogance and who that so often seems to accompany good looks. He's completely comfortable and at ease with himself.

He's not jealous. He knows I get hit on when I go out and he also knows that I wouldn't betray him for a second.

And, as much as he hates me telling him this, he does look ridiculously 'cute' on occasion 😉

I'm late 40s and he's a few years older. It's taken me 30 years of dating and rubbish relationships to meet someone I feel this way about. He was well worth the wait!

*ego not who !

Physically, on the taller and leaner side of average would be good. In terms of personality, I want an equal, a friend, someone I can have a laugh with, someone to share good (and bad) times, someone who has his own interests, someone with the ability to debate issues calmly. Someone kind.

Not someone who expects me to be his mother, or his social secretary, or his banker. Which is all I seem to attract. 😕

What is it about him that doesn't attract you?

That's a really weird question. You can't describe why a person isn't attractive to you. It's like asking someone what time they didn't go shopping!

It's not a weird question. I can think of men who I dated but didn't find attractive physically in that they smelt wrong or were too fat or short or they had strange teeth or they were too nice... @Watchkeys

My ideal man is the man I'm with now. He's so lovely and laid back. I'm very laid back so he's perfect for me.

Similar interests. I can imagine talking to him forever, about books, history, wildlife, gardening, politics. Others would be totally bored by us. He's got a good moral standpoint, and clear values aligned with mine. I totally trust him and feel safe with him - I'm not used to feeling someone has my back. But he's also fit with gorgeous eyes, so appearance does come into it, although I suspect I would want him however he looked. Though I have friends I could talk to forever, so it's not just personality.

Hes a really good guy, does anything for me, its his teeth im not attracted to, hes talking about getting them done, i thought i could see past it but i cant, does that make me a bad person?

He's kind, thoughtful, wants to take me out, go on holidays etc.

A man who can end any argument by taking his shirt off …….. 😍

How would you feel if you found out he’d been telling his friends that he didn’t find you very attractive and you had a weird off-putting nose, he didn’t love you but he was sticking around because you did so much for him and bought him stuff?

If you don’t fancy, find him attractive, or have deeper feelings for him after a year then they aren’t suddenly going to appear. It isn’t kind to string him along knowing that he’s clearly far more into you than you are to him and wanting to treat you like the most special thing in his life. Do both of you right and end things.