How often would you message a guy you've just met?

[ToTheNextChapter]

As the title says really. I met a man last weekend at a house party, we chatted all night and had a little drunken kiss at the end. We've messaged multiple times a day since but I'm not sure this would be considered "normal"?!

To put it in context I split with my H of 21 years in April, so very recent and still raw. I found out he was on Tinder a couple of weeks ago and was really upset about it as I thought it was disrespectful so soon after we split.

I've been very clear with him that I'm not ready for anything, not even a drink together at the moment, but we are talking about anything and everything. I'm so out of the dating game that I'm not sure what is overkill with regards contact, or whether I'm just overthinking it!

You don't even want to go for a drink with him but are messaging multiple times a day. Od say you are sending very mixed messages.
Either keep messaging and see where it goes or stand firm with your 'nothing happening ' and stop messaging. You can't have it both ways, the bloke will be very confused.

What do you want to happen? Is this guy aware you are very newly single?

Beware of love bombing. Who is driving the intense messaging?

I'm not a fan this early. Where's the build up, the anticipation? But then I like my independence and would only speak daily in a relationship.

I've seen the term Love Bombing used on here a lot and wondered what it was. I've been in a pretty unhappy marriage for a long time so this is all very new to me.

At first it was him sending the messages first, but I have also initiated over the past couple of days.

I guess I'd like to continue to message and get to know him then see what happens in a couple of months or so, or when I'm ready. He is aware of my situation as is a mate of a mutual friend.

You want to texts loads every day for a couple of months?

You spoke to him all night at the party and kissed at the end of the night, but you wont meet him again for afew months?

I personally could just talk every day for months and months, it would become abit boring

Your ex-H being on Tinder 2 weeks ago is "so soon" and "disrespectful" but you flirting and kissing a guy is ok?

You've just left a relationship with your dh.

What are you even thinking about this?

Are you healed? Is your dh healed?

How would you feel if it were the other way around?

Focus on yourself and your own space.

If there are dc involved it is way too soon to be giving this any headspace.

You're telling a guy you barely know your relationship baggage?