Confused after breakup

[CharliesMum28]

My ex left me on sunday, he has told me i am no longer his girlfriend however doesnt want me to tell my son yet (no my exs child) and he has also only nipped back and collected a few bits of clothes and toiletries since, leaving most of his belongings. He told me he might just need some time apart but doesnt want me to get my hopes up. I am so distraught and dont want to give my self false hope incase he doesnt come back. We had been together 18 months and had a lovely relationship. How do i cope?

So he's basically keeping you dangling?

Why do you want someone who can be this disrespectful of your feelings? He knows he's hurting you, and he's doing nothing to support you. Even as an ex, if he cared about you, he wouldn't do this to you.

Hes trying to keepyou as a side option. Dont let him do this.

Pack up his bits and tell him to collect them, you wish to move on from today.

Right now you are exactly where he wants you. Confused,hoping,waiting.

Take back control and block him after he collects his stuff.

Bag his stuff up and say if not collected in 24/48 hours then it's going to the tip.

Pack up his stuff and leave it in the doorstep then block him

He’s keeping you on the back burner in case it doesn’t work out with the OW.

what a wanker. Get angry. End it for good.

He has said you are no longer his girlfriend.

What and when you tell your son is now nothing whatsoever to do with him. I would at least tell him this.

Pack up his stuff. Tell him to collect it.

Don’t let him keep you dangling while he shags about/chases up a better offer - you deserve more than being second prize. Pack his stuff - do NOT take him back if it doesn’t work out with whoever he is shagging, he’ll only do it again.

YOU decide if he comes back or not, it isn't up to him as he dumped you and that goes on the 'Reasons not to take him back' list.
Tell him he needs to collect his shit before you chuck it out as you are not a storage facility and it's cluttering up your home.

Then he has to make up his mind and so do you.

He's keeping you hanging. Bag his stuff up and tell him to arrange a day to collect it this weekend or it goes. I know that you have hope but you don't want someone who sees you as a 'hmmm maybe'.

I asked him straight out was there someone else and he said no. Do you think he is lying? He was offering to send me money last night so i could go out and enjoy myself. He said he has only felt unhappy for a few weeks so why has he given up so easily? And if there is someone else why hasnt he taken all of his things and cut contact. He is a lovely decent man i am so confused its breaking my heart.

Of course he would deny it. He’s keeping you dangling and is waiting to see if it works out with new woman. Maybe it won’t, so he doesn’t want to completely alienate you.

of course I don’t know this is what’s happening but it’s depressingly likely.

Stop trying to analyse him.

All you can do is react to what he has done.

Perhaps if you pack his stuff up, tell him fine it's over get gone, perhaps he might realise his mistake, or perhaps not.

I just wouldn't entertain a man who had walked out, but still wanted to dictate my reaction and how I dealt with my child.

He could go. Go on find someone, something better if you like. Gone past caring.

You need to call the shots. It’s up to you to tell your child when you want not for him to decide. Pack his stuff up and tell him you have decided what you need, not him.
Then try and move on. If he comes running you will know he cares if he doesn’t you know you deserve better. It’s hard but you cannot let him dictate your life.