I don't know how much time he has left

[lokosport]

My partner has , as yet an undiagnosed condition that causes him to have spontaneous brain lesions and related symptoms.
We don't know what the future holds. His attitude is that the Drs still don't
Know what's wrong with him so he's not
Going to worry about the future but live for now and deal with symptoms as they arise.

I know that this is a sad post but his birthday is coming up and he is adamant that he doesn't want a decent gift. We normally spend Quite a bit on one another for big Occasions.
I want to give him something very special as I don't know if this will be his last.
I gave him a photo book as part of his Christmas present so I won't give him that.

He can't travel very far as a passenger .
He isn't working or driving or allowed to fly.
He gets fatigued after short walks too ( for context) He is very close to his kids and all of his family . He has a lovely
Group of friends but doesn't want to go and meet them for his birthday.

Please inspire me. We will have that weekend together on our own so I'd love to make it very special.
ThaNks in advance

I'm sorry about your dhs diagnosis. It must be really difficult not knowing how long you have, but also knowing it might be short. Is there anything he's always wanted to do that he might be able to do now?

Ironically, it was for us both to travel.

Thanks @longtompot

Could you go to a posh hotel in an area that holds special memories for you? Or a Michelin starred restaurant?

I once took my DP for a surprise weekend break, in our own home town! It's lovely to see familiar places through the eyes of a tourist.

That's a lovely idea but he is firstly a real home bird but secondly is very self conscious as his balance is off and his face has nerve damage.
I'd love that though x

When faced with your own mortality as he is, material stuff becomes irrelevant. However, experiences become more important. You know him best, so think what he either likes doing and is still able to do ( could be music related or visual) or a new experience he can manage.

Have you got DC at home or will it just be the two of you?

What about a private dining room? I've heard quite a few country pubs have them, as do larger hotels.

Thanks. Just the two of us .
I think that a beautiful dinner at home and his favourite film is probably what he wants the most but really, we do that a lot .
He wants no fuss as he doesn't want to talk about the future right now.

I think I would just do/eat all his favourite things that can be done at home...or if he's up to a drive out, take a picnic of all his favourite things somewhere with a great view?

Make him his favourite breakfast in bed. If he enjoys a nice bath, run him one and leave him for a soak while you wash up.

Put on his favourite music or film, give him a massage, cook a lovely meal, bake his favourite cake etc.

I hope you both manage to have a lovely day together whatever you decide.

Thank you.

You could get his friends together to come to him for his birthday. Given his unfortunate condition, its not surprising he wouldn't want to go and see them, I'm sure they'd come to see him though.

What a bout a personalised gift ?
Apart from a photo book?

How about look at a caterer that will come to you and make you a fancy meal at home? Or have an in home spa day and book someone to come and do a couples massage? Whatever he will like but do it at home rather than go out for it.

How about a private chef at home, so you can both enjoy the meal.

Could you get a chef to come and cook his favourite meal in your own home?

Hire a private chef

And perhaps a local band to play at your window

OP, I absolutely understand that you wish to do something very special in case it is his last birthday, but you need to look at this from his point of view. To him, it might feel scarily like giving the condemned man a hearty breakfast, before his execution.
Also, it is his birthday, and you really need to go with whatever will make him happy, rather than a big gesture present so you don’t feel guilty later if the worst happens.
If there isn’t even a diagnosis at this point, he might have something that is a slow chronic neurological condition like MS, and be around for years yet. Try not to meet trouble halfway.

What about hiring one of those companies who do the igloos or teepees and they put lovely, comfortable furnishings in them and you could watch a film and see the stars with a lovely meal

These are all so lovely thanks.
If You'd told Me I'd be posting this question a month ago, I would have said you'd gone mad .

I am so sorry you are going through this. Only advice is to check everything with him and take his lead as to what he wants.

madeinoldstead.co.uk

What about this? It is a Michelin star chef that prepares the food and then you finish it at home? So you get something really special and a real treat for him but he can be at home?

There are a few websites which list companies who offer virtual travel experiences. A meal cooked at home by a chef, or get one of those home delivery kits from top restaurants and cook it together, if he's up to it, and watch one of these tours from the comfort of your living room or bed.
Not sure what personalised gift you could get him though. A piece of the moon or a star, or a tiny plot of land in his name? We got our ds a lordship for his 16th birthday. Might be something fun.