Am I living a fantasy

[GyrosGirl]

Or could this even work?

Bit of background, been dating someone since the start of the year, we've been friends/in contact for about 8 years but only started dating this year. Have always had feelings for eachother but never really acted on it.

He's accepted a job abroad before we started dating, and starts soon, about 5 hrs plane ride away. He's got no kids but is close with family so has family where he's accepted the job and near me in the UK so he would be back and forth a lot.

I've got a 'regular' job and live in the UK. He's met my child before but we've not introduced them to him as my boyfriend yet but she knows him. I've met all his family and friends as know them mutually. We are all on good terms.

Am I being mad to think this could work? I've no major problems potentially moving abroad one day if I loved it in the country he's moving to, so do I give this a chance?

He's very keen on planning for us to be in each others lives, lots of suggestions of visiting and we've made loads of plans to the end of this year for holidays and events together, even plans after he's already moved. So my brain is a bit fried thinking this through.

Basically can you do a ldr with one child or am I being crazy for considering it??

I'd manage my expectations if I were you. It's a newish relationship so you've not got the tie of a long history behind you, and there's a possibility either of you could meet someone else who is more present. Particularly him, given he is the one without responsibility and starting a new life with new people to meet. I wouldn't rush to end it, but nor would I be pinning everything on it as a future either.

A serious relationship is not going to work with someone that far away. Unless it's a fixed term contract and he has been clear with you and reassured you that he will be moving back home again in 6 months (a year tops) then I think you should cut your losses now. Because he's just not that into you.

He may only have even dating you a short time but he has known you for years so if he has still chosen to move abroad permanently then he clearly doesn't see a serious future with you.

If you didn’t have a child and were happy just to see where the future took things it might be feasible. Realistically, how often are you going to be able to visit him both to properly develop the relationship and to see whether you like the country he lives in, when you have a child in tow?

It’s a new relationship, and long distance is hard enough when you’re an established couple with strong foundations. Do you want a proper partner, or are you happy with several years of a sometimes-boyfriend? Because that’s ultimately what he will be.

No advice is relevant - how do you feel as that's the best guide. You should really want it, enough to make it work. assuming he does.
Happiness is an elusive spectre, rarely held for long - so....................

It wouldn’t be for me, not without an end date or plan in place. I wouldn’t have got into it at the start once I heard he was moving.