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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

First date- all mixed up

4 replies

Tempnamelady · 29/05/2022 19:53

I split from DH over a year ago after I had an affair with a man I absolutely adored ( don’t flame me, if you read my history on here I’ve not had an easy time). New partner and I split under very difficult circumstances and I did see him a couple of weeks ago for the first time this year , but the circumstances haven't changed and so we can’t be together. I’m really trying to move on.
I decided to join a dating site and I have actually hit it off and had great banter with one man. We went out on a date today, it was nice, we talked and laughed, he’s a gentleman and not bad looking , not my usual type though.
We agreed to meet again, but its just bringing back all the feelings i have for my old boyfriend. We were close friends for 17 years, I adore him , he feels the same but its just a non starter.
I don’t know if i should just keep ploughing on and see if something clicks? Just feel so shit and sad 😞

OP posts:
DatingDinosaur · 29/05/2022 20:03

Generally, it sounds like it’s too soon for you to be dating again.

Enjoy the company of this new guy for what it is, in the moment – sounds like he’s the Rebound Guy anyway but you never know.

In the longer term, maybe take some time out from dating to process your thoughts/feelings on why you’re so hung up on a guy you cannot have and make peace with your inner self about that.

Wherearemymarbles · 29/05/2022 23:39

So you had a crap marriage for however long,
had an affair, that didnt work out so you’re dating.

why not try being single for a while?

Vapeyvapevape · 29/05/2022 23:41

why not try being single for a while

I agree, you need to spend time as a single person, maybe look into why you feel you need to find a partner so soon.

Overthewine · 29/05/2022 23:48

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

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