Ive been thinking lately about the abuse I suffered at the hands of my ex husband.
He hasn’t seen his child in person for almost 3 years, 2 years of that in the family court system. He was sent on courses and programmes and successfully completed them.
Contact via video resumed about 5 weeks ago. I’ve noticed that he is absolutely the same person. He may have learnt to control his anger but the reason behind it all is still there and the same. He is such a strange person with these odd needs. He needs desperately to be seen as up high on a pedestal, he can’t be second best, he can’t share that pedestal. He doesn’t seem to want to do the hard parenting just buy things and talk the talk. When I hear the phonecalls to our child he sounds so very odd. He almost sounds like he is grooming our child instead of letting the relationship happen over real things and time.
I wonder why does he feels such a desperate need to be seen as someone amazing?
He was like that in our relationship. I remember the same intensity at the beginning and I was swept off my feet, he was extremely generous. The issues happened when I swayed from this and didn’t show my appreciation enough. In the past before contact stopped he was so intense with our child and adoring until they were naughty and he would then return them to my door saying take your child back.
Does this have a name?
Even on the phone calls now he repeats remember daddy is the best, the best in his profession etc and that means so are you!