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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

I thought I was ready to leave, but...

5 replies

22primrose · 23/05/2022 10:57

I thought I was ready to leave DH, I've thought about it numerous times over the last 3 years. Things have been really hard for us both and he pushed me away to the point where I stopped trying to make it work. However, he's now devastated about the thought of me leaving that the guilt is making me reconsider. We have 2 DS who are under 5. We started seeing a counsellor and he's accepted he took us for granted. He's also trying really hard, but I can't see it being sustained knowing that I've made all the same points before, just now I'm telling him with someone else there!

I guess my question is how normal this last minute panic is about thinking I'm making a mistake. Has anyone left and regretted it?!

OP posts:
MyDogLucy · 23/05/2022 11:05

It's very hard to say. It could be that you have realised you still love him and want to try to make it work, or it could be that you do want to leave but now it's suddenly become real, you're scared of losing your 'normal'.

Me and my husband have separated recently, I've been unhappy for a long time and although he wants us to try again, deep down in my mind I think I've accepted that it's never going to work. However I'm sat here in tears every day and having to stop myself from calling him and asking him to come back. It's so hard. So be kind to yourself, it's going to take some time to figure things out in your mind. I would certainly stick with the counselling, as I think that will help you both figure out what the best way forward is, whether that's together or not.

22primrose · 24/05/2022 10:14

Sorry to hear you’re finding it tough, thank you for the lovely reply though and hoping you find your happiness again.

OP posts:
MyDogLucy · 24/05/2022 16:17

Thank you and same to you. How are you feeling today?

Fourhorses · 25/05/2022 00:06

Bump

22primrose · 26/05/2022 20:31

Sorry for the delay. No change. Confused as ever!

OP posts:
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