Not really got anywhere else to post this but it’s my birthday today and I feel really lonely.
Last year I was much happier - I had a group of close friends who I spoke to most days and a partner who I was happy with.
The friendship group has drifted as two of them fell out, which means we don’t have the group chat or meet up together any more.
I had a disagreement with my partner a couple of days ago because I realised that he doesn’t consider me or my needs unless it benefits him to.
We had an argument partly because he hadn’t even spoken to the kids about my birthday and they’d been telling me they felt guilty as they hadn’t organised something.
One of the other reasons we argued was because I noticed that whenever I ask him for something, he never does it.
I literally have example after example of me asking him to do something (always something I can’t do myself) and him just not doing it.
There’s no reason for this, other than he doesn’t think it’s important. I then either have to pretend to myself that it’s not important and I don’t mind or keep asking him.
He doesn’t like to be ‘nagged’ so that is counterproductive and I’m always left feeling like my needs don’t matter.
I’ve also realised that I have completely neglected my own needs recently.
All my time has been spent accommodating him and the kids and I’ve given up all my own activities.
I feel pretty down about that too.
This morning I’ve woken up and the kids have been lovely.
Written nice messages in cards, got me pressies etc.
He has ignored me all morning, except for telling me to get out of bed.
No card. No ‘happy birthday’. Nothing.
He is an ‘ignorer’ when we fall out but had got much better so I thought he would come round and at least make a bit of an effort this morning, but no.
We usually all have breakfast together and I wouldn’t have to make it but this morning he’s just sat in the living room on his phone watching videos while I made the kids breakfast.
I’m not really one for a big fuss but I just like to feel appreciated on one day a year and I don’t think I can forgive him for behaving like this.
It’s his birthday in a couple of weeks and I feel like doing the same back to him, which isn’t like me at all.
I’m also at a loss as to what to do during the day as I wanted to go somewhere nice with the kids but I just don’t want him to come and ruin it.
Thanks for reading