Tell me not to text him please

[TomatoRusk]

Please be kind. We had an argument, he's asked for space. I'm fighting every instinct I have to respect his wishes. I know I need to wait and let him come to me when he's ready. The argument was both our fault, we both got stressed, I'm not gong to give details. My instinct after a fight is to seek reassurance, to be needy basically. His is to withdraw. I remember a thread recently about posters being very upset after arguments which resonated but I can't find it now, and now I'm in that situation. I also recognise a lot of the anxiety from the current other thread about the boyfriend on holiday. I'm trying to do the right thing. Tell me not to text him tonight.

Honestly, the minute you send the msg, you'll regret it! You could be left on read, see he's online but not replies etc... Will open a whole other can of worms!
Sleep on it & send a msg in the morning if you want to. *hugs

Don't do it because going against his wishes will make the problem you want to resolve far worse and you'll be kicking yourself wishing you hadn't pushed him further away

Do not text!
Turn your phone off and put it in another room while you listen to some favourite music - not the melancholy stuff.

Similar situation here, op. No falling out but messaged someone earlier and the arsehole hasn't replied so I'm making a million and one scenarios up in my head and none of them are positive.

And breath and relax...

Thank you. That's exactly it isn't it, I'd push him further away. And you're so right, I would be then looking and waiting for a reply. Thank you.

I'm desperate for him to get in touch. I need to let him.

Sorry you're in a similar situation, it sucks doesn't it. I can't bring myself to turn my phone off. I'm going to try and distract myself though.

Write down what you want to say on paper: Get your emotions out but don’t type a text. Give him his space and let him see that you respect and understand him. If he knows you well then he will hopefully realise that you need reassurance and you’ve done this for him.

This is a good idea. I was going to suggest typing it out and sending it to yourself. Then switch off your phone. When he's ready to talk to you, you can tell him what the message says. For now, respect his wishes and distract yourself with whatever it takes

Thank you all. I'm going crazy. I want to text him, or call him, so so much. I've written out how I'm feeling and what I'd say to him with no filters. It's not pretty, it looks desperate and pathetic. I certainly feel pathetic. It sounds stupid, but we always text goodnight, if neither of us does tonight that's really huge for us.

If you really don’t want to
delete number ! And delete conversation
and if you wish write his no down

then all temptation is removed
and keep busy

I’m seeing someone who has as annoying tendency to go into a man cave (men are from mars , women are From Venus - somewhat cliched but many truths ) when things wobble

it’s how some people handle it

Do you remember the Friends scene where Rachel sent Ross a very very long letter? Channel that whenever you are tempted!