Drowning in Life

[DexysMum]

Ive copied my original mesaage below. Sorry its my first post!

Can you type the message out. The message is hard to read

Sounds like it's all work and no play. You had to move away from an established friendship circle and now it's tough to find another. Please make time for some balance or you will be burnt out or you may be there already. Speak to your H and voice your thoughts and concerns.

Small steps, join a hobbie club/gym. Do something you enjoy. Take DC swimming maybe? Soon you may see some regular faces and build on that?

I'm a fellow transplant into Cardiff. Are you a member of the Cardiff Mums Facebook group? I've seen a few posts on there of people looking to connect with fellow mums.

Other than your friend in London, what else would moving back bring? It's not a magic solution that will solve the way you feel. You'd still have the job you hate and a DH who expects you to pick up the slack when DC is ill. You need to have a frank discussion with your DH about splitting the load fairly (which I appreciate is easier said than done as I need to have the same conversation with mine) and perhaps you need to search for a new job? Cardiff to London is a 2 hour train journey, so you can go back for day trips with your friend or meet halfway?

Sorry, forgot to add about hobbies. Cardiff has some large female running groups that also meet socially too. I also know of crafty groups that are back to meeting once a week too.

Its basically how i moved to Cardiff with loads of friends and they were excited for us to move here but rapidly lost interest when my son was born. My husbands family show no interest at all and if my son has a cold or cough from nursery (theres always something) they don't visit him or invite him places. I want to move back to London. Ive taken a job i hate as the funeral trade (Previous Career) here is nowhere near the pay of what i would get in London. We are mortgage free in Cardiff and if we moved we would need at least a mortgage for 150k to cover the cost of a place there. My husband thinks its silly to move. My entire family is there and all my friends. It would mean my son can socialise with my friends kids as my husband never calls his friends to come over if he does its one every 2 months. He has said he is happy just working and coming home on the weekends its just the three of us but theres no other adult company. Ive always had a core group of friends and i know no one here. Ive joined groups and met some people but eventually they just stop wanting to meet up or we dont click. I feel we would have a better quality of life if we moved back because im completely miserable and i dont know what else to do.

I had the conversation but he said he isnt bothered about maintaining his friendships which scares me a little we have always been social and gone to partys ect now its just nothing. Im dreading Jubilee weekend everyone having great times with their mates while we are home. The train is so expensive my NHS wage here wont allow me to fork out £200 for a ticket. I feel like moving back would be a new lease of life my sisters and brothers are there we could have nights out as a couple again. I could talk to other adults besides just him when he isnt glued to his phone.🙄

The coach to London is much cheaper than the train.