How long after you decided to break up did you live separately?

[ZenKaleidoscope]

My husband and I have been together for 10ish years, been married 7 years. Have a 5 and 2 year old.

We will break up but I can't bare to live separately until youngest is in school, due to not wanting to live away from him. Also I won't be able to afford a mortgage while childcare fees are so high.

Has anyone managed to be together for so long knowing it's going to end in a few years?

When do we start tiling for divorce? How do I get my ducks in a row?

I think it would be awful to try and live that way if I'm honest. But it depends on how amicable you are. I separated from my H last month after 21 years together which is devastating, but once we'd made the decision he moved out 5 days later. The atmosphere was so tense and we were both so, so sad. I couldn't have lived that way much longer but that's just me. Good luck.

I couldn't live like that. I had good reasons for getting divorced - the atmosphere was very unhappy while I was still there. I moved out within a couple of weeks so we could both get on with our lives.

It was a couple of days…I’d thought he’d be a good father who wanted to share parenting and that it would take months of shared living whilst he organised a new home for himself - instead he upped and moved countries!
Do what needs to be done so your children live in a calm, loving environment with no tension.

We can't afford for one of us to move out as we need to sell our house and since we'd be splitting custody roughly 60/40 to me I'm not ready for my youngest to be away from me every week.

We are amicable. We both still love eachother we just have no chemistry. We are both sad about it but we both feel relieved that we want the same thing of separating when the family is ready for it.

Not having chemistry is a very over simplified way if saying we aren't really sexually compatible and we don't communicate well enough to improve it

Tried to live together "as friends" until ex got himself sorted with a new place (I was buying him out and keeping the house) but it was disastrous. Finally got him to move out a month later. He went to live with a friend.