I just DON'T believe him...grrrrr!

[greeneyedgirl]

Ok, so hubby has recently made a big thing of dumping his dp over Christmas because he wants to make a go of it with me. We have been apart for nearly 2 years and I have made it quite clear this will never happen.

Anyway, he pushed the subject and I very politely said I just wanted to be friends and the shit hit the fan. Sent loads of insulting spiteful texts, even telling me he wishes we had never had a child together.

Anyway is his weekend to have her and I said to my Mum, I know he will cancel. He has just texted, saying he has been really sick all day and had tests at the drs (they never do that unless there is a serious problem) and he can't have our daughter. He has done this type of thing before and I just don't believe him.

All he wants to do is feel sorry for himself all weekend. I am absolutely digusted with him, he NEVER puts our dd before himself (and has told me that I am the selfish one for not wanting to get her family back together). He has even said he will probably move away and only see her in the holidays. Whether he said that to get at me I don't know, but right now I just hate him.

Sorry for the rant, just had to get it all out. What a fucking tosser! I can't wait to be divorced.

He wants you to feel sorry for him with this tests thing, emotional blackmail. He couldn't cope with you refusing him.

He's an emotional loser, you have lost a right charmer.

Rant away

Hubby ?

Surely that is a term of endearment ?

He is a wanker, you are well rid

Breath.... In with love, Out with anger.

If I was you, I wouldn't want him to have her this weekend when he is this bl unreasonable, would affect her IMO.

It just confirms the decision you made about not having him back.

Just wait for the dust to settle, he is licking his wounds.

well done for getting shot of this loser - remind him that although he thinks he is hurting you by pissing around your dd - but one day she will be 10 and wonder why her daddy is such a tosser - so in actual fact all he is succeeding in doing is creating another person to hate him for being a complete tosser.

becuase if you dont have to mess around with access, making sure your daughter is emotionally ok, having to put up with him buying her stuff you cant afford or wouldnt like her to have, having to cope with two sets of conflicting parenting ideas

never mind any logistics that are involved - remind him that by staying away - he is actually making YOUR life easier but HER life harder

good rant, he sounds awful

his loss remember that - and practice this phrase - idiot man! it's XH's man when i'm generous and tosser when he is.

just wants to wreck your w/e as well - why do men do that? they're all idiots! lol.

Text back something like "Poor you -- hope you feel better soon. Actually that's good news for us, though, as DD and I have had an invitation somewhere else that I thought we'd have to turn down but now we can go after all. Have a good weekend!"

I think he is convinced that he will spoil anything that I have planned (he already accused me the other day of only wanting him to have her so I could go out).

The stupid thing is I really think he expects me to believe his story. Apparently he couldn't tell me earlier as he left his phone at home . Then told me he went to the medical room where he works and fell asleep (who does that???????). Then he said that although the dr had apparently thought he needed tests done, he "told" him all he needed was to go home and rest. It is such bullshit!

I sincerely hope he does move abroad like he says he is thinking of, then my poor dd won't have to deal with him being such a fuckwit. Does he really not understand why I don't want to be with him?

good for you for standing up for him

so after 2 years, when you have been getting on with your life ,looking after DD and generally making things better, he has remained the same selfish , emotionally stunted 'man' he always was

you are far better off without him!

and what did the doctor think was so terribly wrong with him??

greeneyedgirl im so sorry hes doing this to you, why do men think we will drop everything for you, i don`t know what happend as to why he left you, but if he cheated on you with the gf he dumped you for then i think you have done the right thing

2yrs is a long time and you have moved on so why can`t he??

I`m so with men right now, i hope there is some good ones out there.

My xp said to me today when he gave me the maintenance well i take it you will be going out with that tonight, and put it this was it would only get me a taxi to a bar and back!!!!

He is such an idiot, why do they think by letting our DDs down this will upset us??? NO IT WILL UPSET THEM!!!

Sorry for ranting on

Lets just hope he does actually get ill then he will have wished he never said that!!!

I am seriously thinking about not letting dd go to him the next weekend she is due. He had her for 5 days over the new year and only just now has she turned back into my lovely child from being the spawn of satan I got back from him!!

I seriously need to re-think the visiting arrangements as I think he is just too emotionally unstable at the moment, all this just proves it.

maybe just supervised visits? or no over night stays - how old is your DD?

I think that would be the best thing to do really, i think he is playing on this and he thinks to himself that this is getting to you, but he will realise he is missing out and he wont be able to get back what he`s missed out on

DTM i was thinking the same thing, is it the time of year for men like these to mess us around when we only want whats best for our DCs???

I think its something in the air!!!

He didn't cheat MOAP, but he was verbally and emotionally abusive to me and I have been much better off without him; even tho I am having to live with my parents because I will get nothing from the divorce.

Last yr he bought a brand new flat (which he now can't afford) and fucked off to Cuba on a 3 week all inclusive holiday (where he met gf). Previously to the holiday, round about June time, he stopped paying maintenance as he found out I was dating, he only re-started it in Nov.

Tosser is too tame a word for this idiot!

DD is 3.

i can`t believe he has done all that and thinks you will just roll over and take him back!!

Im so glad he didnt cheat as it seems alot of men are all cheating at the moment and it makes me so angry!

I think the verbal and emotional abuse is far worse though, hes still trying it on with the emotional abuse now isnt he im so glad you are rising above it though, he needs to know he cant do this and you are doing that so well done im proud of you

Your DD will work all this out for herself i think, she will only stay little for so long! They do know whats going on even if they don`t look like they do.

Its his loss and i do feel so sorry for your DD as non of this is her fault yet he is taking it out on her

I am dreading her getting older, because I am going to be picking up the pieces when he lets her down or disappoints her. I can already see it happening!

I have the same problem, he turned up 20 mins late today for DD and all he evver says is sorry, it really pisses me off but what can i say really, he never gets it and theres nothing i can do to make him see that he`s upsetting DD not me

I've had all this crap for the last 7 years.
Cancelling, arriving late, £16 CSA payments. Empty promises, puts his DW before our dcs. etc etc.

They don't change!

My eldest dd is 12, she once even called him a 'tosser' to his face She hates his W and hasn't been out with dad for 4 months (her choice)

They never understand it's US STRONG WOMEN that have to pick the peices up. I hope all the losers sleep well in their beds at night. Karma will get you.....

These blokes don't seem to have retained the braincells they were born with!!! He texted me last night saying thanks for having dd! What an idiot....possibly his conscience is giving him twinges because there is NOTHING wrong with him!

I am still sooo angry with him that he better stay away from me if he wants to keep his fertility intact!