Strange chat about men who work on oil rigs

[draycentral]

So, I've either been living under a rock or my friend is full of crap.
My partner works on oil rigs ... home every few months for a few months.
I saw that he had liked sexy pics of a woman he didn't know on ig. Pulled him up on it and that was the end of that as far as I was concerned.
My friend however announced this morning that riggers are notorious for online affairs/ interactions and general Inappropriate on line behaviour with women..
Utter tosh or am I blinded?

No experience of male riggers, per se, but my (female) friend is an oil and gas engineer and goes off shore a few times a year. She said that sexual harassment is just an everyday occurrence, and the women were taught tactics for warding off non-consensual behaviour because it was such an issue.

Ex neighbour oil rig worker. Liked the devil's dandruff way too much & open about visiting working girls. Can't speak for vast majority though.

OP surely you know your partner better than your friend. You have to use your own judgement and not generalise.

I know two people who work on rigs, one male one female, both management/higher technical positions.

The male says the environment is misogynistic/toxic masculinity and finds that often manual staff won't even speak to him as they hate the managerial/higher technical staff.
The female has described experiencing daily sexual harassment and several deeply terrifying experiences.

I also use to take an aberdeen train full of riggers on their way to/from jobs. Awful awful. I'm afraid I associate it with misogyny, drinking/drug culture, poor behaviour generally. I'm sure infidelity would be supported by that system/environment

I'm sure this all is not true of everyone. But yes that's the general vibe.

Is your friend trying to maybe subtly tell you something?

I don't thinks so but my senses are up now

I really don't know about oil rig workers but I remember had a male pal who worked abroad in Afghanistan few years ago and he said that most of the men on the stop off on the way home would pay for prostitutes even though going home to their wives. Not all men will do it and not all men follow like sheep and not all are bad and have affairs. That is like saying all policemen are aggressive cheaters.

I used to live in NE Scotland and had many friends/acquaintances whose partners worked offshore.

I would say a significant minority of riggers are deeply sexist, hard drinkers when onshore and prone to casual sex whenever possible, whether they are in a relationship or not.

Some grow up and out of that lad culture, even if they turn a blind eye to the dickish ones, some settle down, have a proper serious relationship - often when they decide to move back to fully onshore life and some stay stuck as emotionally immature knobheads for life.

You should be aware it's a different culture but your partner can make his own choices and hopefully they will be good ones.

Id say its very common yes- I have both been on the painful receiving end of this and also i work in the Oil industry - Its not just oil rigs either, its FPSO's, abroad but on land, month on month off, its rife, not only online, S-workers hang around the bases, bars and compounds.

Trying to not be outing here but I know someone who works on the rigs whose fiancé left him. No one in the family knows why. She cut all contact with him and moved far away. I have my suspicions.

My best friend of 35 years is online dating in Aberdeen and nearby. She constantly regales me with tales of married oil riggers coming onshore and looking for hookups on dating apps and pretending they are not married.

you also only have to look at the reputation of the ceo of our own British oil company (“integrated energy company”.) His and his peers’ reputation in aberdeen when they were on the way up leaves much to be desired

When I was a student back in the 90's I used to go and visit my friend who was a student nurse. Some of the big oil companies would put fliers/posters up around the nurses quarters to advertise parties. I only ever went to one. You got picked up at the door, ferried to a house full of riggers and the drink was free and plentiful. My friend and I left early when it was pretty obvious what the main aim of the party was. We were pretty naïve but at least we left early on, some unpleasant stories came out afterwards. It wasn't the last party held though.

Pretty much all my friends work offshore / expat life. Cheating (on both sides) is sadly pretty common. It’s a bit of a work hard play hard lifestyle.

This just gets worse. I really have been living under a rock.

A family member works on an oil rig. He misses his family terribly when away, and while I couldn't swear he doesn't look at porn, I think it unlikely and he doesn't do drugs or cheat.

Stereotypical much?? There may be a very lad culture out there but surely it’s the on shore behaviour that matters? You must know yourself what he is like. I think occupation is irrelevant whether a cheat or not.

Liking a sexy babe's photo who was unknown to him has set alarm belles
Ringing

I used to love the idea of an oil rigger. I like my own space and an independent man who doesn't need your company all the time. Usually solvent so no cocklodger risk. Unfortunately every single one I met has been sex/porn obsessed, badgering for nudes and probably questionably single so I've shelved that one now in the category of avoid!

Oh great. I've just started speaking to someone on Hinge today and they work offshore 😂 Should I run now? He's already mentioned 'the reputation'.

I worked offshore where I met my husband so at least that was positive for me but could tell you plenty stories of men with s workers. Pretending they were asked to stay longer but headed to London for sexual health checks before heading home. The same excuse but staying at the base in West Africa to spend time and stay with an s worker rather going home to wife. Going out for meals. The s worker was actually telling him when he had too much to drink and made his sandwiches for work!!!!!! I could go on 🤦‍♀️

No. All I See is a man who wants go marry me but who likes pics of a sexy pic on ig

Probably Super
Although they're not all bad! My experiences are shitty coke taking drinkers who like a party...

They’re all over dating apps and chat sites.

Lived and worked as student in Aberdeen over 30years ago and when I took train back home to visit dps, didn't matter what time of day I travelled there would always be some drunk, lewd oil rigger trying to chat me up and buy me a drink ....after weeks on the rigs they'd be raring to go
likewise my student nurse friends would always get hassled by roustabouts when they went out to the nightclubs
they had an awful reputation back then and it appears nothings changed