Sister makes no effort

[Sunshinekim]

How do you deal with family that make no effort?

My sister makes no effort at all, and never says anything nice about my children on social media or IRL. If i post a photo theres no like or well done or congratulations. Its really starting to get me down. We only met up if I message her, and then I feel I can't talk about my kids. She has kids similar age so not sure if it's jealousy but if so that's so sad and petty.

What constitutes ‘effort’, exactly?

I don’t think you should be using social media likes as a measure of your relationships.

I never needed my brother to say anything nice about my children. I can't remember if he did or he didn't. I think there can be a bit more unhealthy enmeshment with sisters though.

she may not be the best sister in the world but maybe you've slipped in to a competitive dynamic that is unsettling for her too.

I mean this with kindness but maybe she doesn't want to? Maybe the level of relationship you have is the one she wants and that differs with your expectations which is always hard.

I'd take a step back and focus on people you are close to.

I think you expectations are off tbh. You seem very focused on what happens on social media.

I hardly ever post likes on congratulations on social media, it means nothing! It’s not sad or petty-you sound like you have had a really disproportionate response to this here!

See her if you want to but why would you not talk about your children?? Does she talk about hers?

Get off social media, problem solved! Not sure why you’re posting pics of your children on there anyway tbh - they’re not old enough to consent to having their image made public 🤷🏼‍♀️

Forget social media all together...it is not a real representation of relationships. People not "liking things" or commenting on stuff on all social media platforms is not real life, and often people will ignore "serial posters" if there is too much content..repeated content etc.

Just talk to her face to face, you could keep it casual, like "everything ok between us?" Or try and make more of an effort yourself with play dates/family trips out.