Found calls between Husband and another woman

[rosyposey23]

Found WhatsApp calls between my husband and another person, no name just a picture of 3 children under 5. A few were video chats at 4am he works away!
My gut did somersaults i just knew it was a female then..
I confronted him in the morning and asked if he had been calling other woman... Don't be stupid he replies, I then ask him to scroll through his call list...There i say.....she's just a friend he says ...I ask him to call her then but he says no and then I loose it big time.
You know in your heart at that moment that the person who only said last night before he went to bed loves you,is a liar and a cheat!!!
I went absolutely crazy , screaming and telling him to leave, my world was torn apart. We were together for 5 years .and in that time i have dealt with him flirting with my best friend and another girl i know so he made me feel disrespected All he kept saying was she was a friend..
He left with a bag and two black bin liners of clothes.
He kept saying..I can't believe your doing this to me , but no inclination of anything else.
He moved back to his home town and I was left with no answers
He did not contact me to try and explain why he would be video chatting a friend at 4am in the morning .
I called him doing the whole crying thing begging him to tell me what happened but again said she's just a friend i have known for 30 years..Hes 56 .
I love him so much and we are now talking but he wants time away and doesn't want to keep going over it again and again.
I was going to go on a holiday we had previously booked alone but now we are talking, he wants to come but I don't think I can be with him.
He says I am his world and he will never do it again .Any female friends he will tell me if there is contact.
Any suggestions please. X

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Thanks ladies for your honest advice.

I knew in my heart that he was full of himself ,I had so many conversations with him regarding his behaviour towards females the flirting was making me feel inadequate and unattractive.
However I am not going to allow him to come on holiday, I need time to heal and he is not worth any more effort ..

I have started walking 5 miles a day ,it clears my head and makes me feel better.

He sounds like he's constantly trying to cheat (or cheating if he gets the opportunity).

You probably should've gotten rid of him before this time anyway.

4am is not a normal time for any sort of normal, friendly convo.

Of course hes going to lie and use the "just a friend" line.

If you get back with him, I didn't he'll stop. It'll just be her or something else in another while.

He just wants someone desperate, with low self esteem enough to put up with it, don't be that person.

He’s a lying cheat. You do your walking and walk right out of his life. Good luck.

Op my lovely you know in your heart he is a cheat and a liar. The trust has gone and if you take him back can you honestly say you will be happy always thinking is he cheating again. Only you can answer that. Sorry I cannot be more helpful but I wish you well in whatever you decide to xx

If she was just a friend he wouldn't have lied about speaking to her

I have a friend who runs his own 'private investigation' business, his 'most used' service is the 'matrimonial'- one where a man or woman who suspects their partner of cheating pays to have them followed - he told me that in a great many cases a man's suspicions are often unfounded, not always but mostly, however in over 90% of cases initiated by a woman there's proof, he puts it down to 'female intuition'. I'd go with your instincts on this one, whenever I've trusted mine in the past I've rarely been disappointed.

He sounds gross. Let him go OP, you can do better.

wondering who that text he just got was from

Having been through something similar in the last few months, this is going to be one of the main things that gets you. A text arrives, you immediately think the worst, phone in their hand, the same applies. You do think, has it really stopped/will it happen again.

We are working through it, but it hurts every day knowing that deep down, it won't ever be the same again.

Get rid. You don’t need his negativities bringing you down.

Carry on if you want more of the same