Maybe yes, maybe no?

[Milou89]

Hi,
I'm dating a guy since the last month. I had two boyfriends in my life and a few dates. I'm 31. We spend a lot of quality time together (doing sports, cooking, walking, playing games, great conversations....) I feel really attracted to him, we share the same values, we both have similar jobs so it helps understanding each other....Sometimes when I'm with him, I feel a magic connection like I never had with another man and other times it's like I feel nothing at all...Sometimes I have the strong feeling that he is "the one" and other times it's like we are just friends. I told a friend of mine about him and she thinks it's just à question of timing. He has two jobs for the moment, he will leave the second one in july. He quit smoking last year and still struggling with it. He was overweight in the past and he's really focused on taking care of him. So what do you think ?

If you're only a few weeks in and you're posting on a forum for advice about whether or not to stay, leave. You really need to set your bar higher than someone who sometimes makes you feel good.

Essentially, think about how you feel with someone, and if you'd be happy to feel this way forever. So, unless you're enjoying these fluctuations, leave, and find someone you feel steadier with.

Absolutely nothing wrong with posting on a forum for advice. Ignore pp in that regard- v strange to question posting in a forum. That's what it's for after all!

I think you need to have a conversation with him about where he sees the relationship going once he has some more time. If he umms and Ahhs you have your answer.

Nice to have you in charge of who OP should listen to, @D0lphine

I thought forums were for people to post their opinions on without being vetted, but I see my opinion is to be ignored, so, never mind. OP, Dolphine knows better than me, best listen to her.

I say give it a little more time since you have such a strong connection with him.

For me personally, whenever I start questioning things so soon after dating someone, it usually means they probably aren't right for me. But I usually try to give it a chance anyway but I'm usually right. :)

Wow haha someone has a bee in their bonnet done they?

Well I think there's nothing wrong with posting about a new relationship. It's not in and of itself an indication that the relationship is bad. It's just sometimes asking strangers their view is helpful.

Also someone essentially asking "why are you posting about this relationship in a relationship forum?" Is comical.

@D0lphine

I didn't ask that question. I said that asking that question indicates something, and it does. No bee, no bonnet, no bun fight. I was making the simple point that you have no right to tell people to ignore what other people say, any more than I do.

Lets leave it there. Sorry for the derail, OP.

I can defo tell OP to ignore you. They don't have to listen. I think it's nonsense personally, they may disagree.

I think posting anything on a relationship board is fine.

Is someone going to give some actual advice instead of bickering between yourselves?

My two cents' worth are that you've only been going out with him a few weeks. It's too early for all those soul searching questions. If you like him and seem to get on, give it a few more weeks. Weigh this up against timewasting, though.

@ValerieCupcake

Everyone on the thread has offered OP advice.

I’m not even sure why you’re posting… it’s too soon to be madly in love yet, or (for most people) to be certain he is ‘the one’,
You are putting too much pressure on yourself/the relationship at this early stage. If the worst thing you can say at the moment is it feels like you are just friends then I would suggest giving it some more time and just have some fun together, see what develops

Last month, and only at the start of this month😂. You've got a long way to go, talk about jumping the gun! At this stage you are way over-analysing about the future when you should be living in the present and just enjoying yourself.