Could get absolutely flamed here but...

[2HB]

In your experience, do men who leave their wives and kids without a care in the world, for their affair partner who also doesn't
Give a shit about her partner's marriage and kids, always trade down?
I ask because recently my exh asked our son who is 11 ' not to tell mummy that his partner is ten years younger than her...'
This is the same
Man who had no issue leaving me day in, say out with three high needs kids while he was pretending to be at work till after the kids were in bed , who came home and pestered me For sex, often coerced. His ap knows about our lively
Kids and has refused to
Meet them for the past three years, spams him all day long when with his kids and goes nuts when he doesn't answer phone or prioritise her.
Yet eh has amazing relationship with her daughter.
Sometimes , I can't believe that I chose such a shit husband and father for the
Kids and that he could be such a scumbag, ultimately .

Just leave him ...and be the good mother for u and your kids
Keep your head held high for you and your children 🌹flower for u
Don't take his shit!!

Why would you be flamed?

@WearenotHuman67 he's her exh already

My ex is the same. Barely did anything for his kids when he lived here, now is constantyl babysitting his affair partners daughter and playing happy families

Where is the trading down reference ?

My dad left my mum after over 50 years together for someone he knew when he was a teenager. They married a month after the divorce was made final - she’s been married and widowed three times 😳dad is lucky number 4!

When we were growing up he was completely absent, my SAHM did everything, he literally couldn’t even be bothered to go to parents evenings, he had no idea of my or my siblings birthdays and the only time he offered any kind of attention was when he had an audience and then came across as dad of the year. He was a shit dad and an even worse husband. All of us are now NC with him as he left the country and has made no attempt to contact any of his children and now completely ignores all our kids. But we hear that he is a great grandad to his new wife’s grandchildren so that’s all good then. However, a leopard does not change his spots and I bet his step-children hate his guts as there is no way he can sustain the good guy act.

Q In your experience, do men who leave their wives and kids without a care in the world, for their affair partner who also doesn't
Give a shit about her partner's marriage and kids, always trade down?

A. Depends what you mean by "trade down" ???

I'm just not sure you can call anyone "without a care in the world."

If by trade down you mean go for someone younger, no. Lots of people leave for same age and even older women.
If you mean go for someone 'inferior' to the primary partner in looks, personality etc then again, no. Though primary partners do tend to be told by their friends that the AP is less attractive, not as nice, a poorer mother etc, for obvious reasons.
Generally men have affairs because they're weak, without conscience, unhappy, self indulgent, or a combination of any of these. The woman they choose doesn't matter at all.

Actions speak loud op your children will see through his ways in time. Stay strong!