I could leave him, of course, but I have no family and am disabled, so it feels like an almost impossible undertaking. I work in the family business because I can choose my own hours and take time off when my health is too poor to work. I used to have a regular job from my teens to my forties but I was sacked from my last 9 til 5 job for poor attendance when I needed to go into hospital one time too many for my employer's liking. Oh, and I'm also in my mid sixties now, so I'm not exactly sought after in the job market, even if I could manage a normal job.
My husband isn't physically abusive, although he was in the early days of our marriage. He criticises me over and over every day though, in a sort of 'Damned if I do, damned if I don't' kind of way. To explain what I mean, a recent example was where we decided to take up a new hobby together and, because we weren't sure if we'd enjoy it or keep it up, I didn't buy all the equipment/clothing and thought we'd manage with the basics until we decided whether or not to continue. That got me into masses of trouble and he was shouting at me for ages because we weren't 'properly dressed'. Two weeks later I'd learnt my lesson and splashed out on 'all the gear' and he then shouted at me again, swearing his head off because we now apparently didn't need all the gear and I had wasted his money.
I feel exhausted by all the criticism, but when I object he says that I am the one causing all the problems and that if I wasn't constantly criticising him(!) we'd be fine.
He also keeps tabs on me all the time and I have been told off for turning off the thing on my phone that lets him track me, so I've had to turn it back on again and I have realised that he is controlling everything in my life basically, but I don't know what to do to make him back off and leave me alone. I feel trapped, but scared to leave because of my health problems. I earn very little and I wouldn't be allowed to continue working in the family business if I left him. Not sure why I'm posting really and I'll be in trouble if he reads this, but surely he can't unless he's somehow found a way to see what I write online? He does work in IT, but I don't think he could monitor my messages? I really hope not.