Pregnant and ex keeps threatening suicide

[oasissummerfruits]

Hi everyone

I'm 8 months pregnant and recently left my ex who had lied, cheated, stolen and emotionally abused me. I had a pregnancy loss (TFMR) in the summer of last year and had thought he was supportive throughout.

Fell pregnant again in September and it wasn't until I fell pregnant again that he changed. I also found out he had been cheating on me throughout the previous pregnancy. I was broken but thought I should try to make it work for the baby.

He had been getting worse and worse and last month I finally told him to leave, which he did. He has walked out on me continuously over the last 8 months and always come back as he pleased, this time I've been strong.

The last few days he keeps telling me he has nothing and nobody, and making threats to end his life. Last night he text me saying he was going to jump in front of a train, I don't know where he was or who with but after that message mine didn't go back through to him. I know he's probably just saying it to make me worry, but also can't help feeling guilty in case anything has happened. It's so hard and I've felt drained these past few days. I didn't ever want this, his actions led to it.

He takes cocaine quite a lot (I'm sure I don't know the full extent) and has a history of suicide in his family, so I can't help but worry I could make things worse.

Does anyone have any ideas or experience as to how I can approach this?

Thanks x

People who want to end their lives, end their lives.

People who want to abuse their ex, say they want to end their lives.

Very soon you will have a new person to take care of. You can't waste time taking care of someone who cheats, lies and takes drugs. He's an adult and can take care of himself.

If he threatens suicide, call the police to go to him. Tell a family member who can help him. Make sure someone is notified and able to respond. Pass the responsibility to someone who can deal with it. Please remember that if he does follow through, it's not your fault.

Even if he did hurt himself- that's a choice he made, not you. Threatening someone and making them responsible if feeling responsible is juts another form of abuse. His choices aren't your responsibility.

DO NOT FEEL GUILTY

He is still emotionally abusing you by manipulating you. If he’s threatening to jump in front of a train, inform police so they can do a welfare check (if you really are concerned).

Tell him you only want contact regarding your baby etc going forward.

He treated you like shit- you are well rid. You and your baby will be fine 💖 stay strong mama

I would call the police and ask for a welfare check then block him.

If he needs to know anything to do with the baby you can unblock him and let him know.

He is trying to control you and worry you. It’s another form of abuse.

Set clear boundaries. He is an ex. He needs to find other means of support, just like you have had to.

You are not responsible for his behavior, or the consequences of his actions.

You only need to focus on making a safe, calm and loving space for the new little one.

I'm sorry for your loss, and the heartache this fellow has caused, and I hope you are getting some rl support

Did he?

His mind is very unstable now, and he needs to get some help. But he is horrid to be telling you that he feels like jumping in front of a train. You are not responsible for him being on a downer in his life,,or any drugs if that is a problem.. His actions will cause a whole lot of worry and problems for many people,if he doesn't try and speak out about his feelings properly.

Tell police each time. He’s not your responsibility. His choice, his decision. StY as much away from him as you can. Also I would sssjne documenting each suicidal threat could be useful re custody requests etc in future.