DP and I have a 11 month old DD and will be expecting DS next week Tuesday.
When I had my daughter in May, I had a terrible labour. I had a third degree tear, I lost 2L of blood and had a punctured spine caused by an anaesthetist which took 3 procedures to fix. I had CBT therapy for the trauma, numerous meetings with medical professionals and now have a negligence case open with a solicitor. I’m just adding all these details to really highlight just how terrible my labour was btw.
Even tho DD had only been here for a month at the time, when it was Father’s day last year, I got him a few bits. A personalised card that had a nice picture of him and DD which he loved along with loads of other things.
Fast forward to this year and at the beginning of March I said to him, ‘all I want to do for Mother’s Day is go out to eat. I just want us to go out as the three of us one last time before the new baby comes.’ I said where I’d like to go but if money was tight then I’d literally be happy with Nando’s up the road from where we live.
Because I know he has a rubbish memory I’d bring it up in conversation and say ‘are we still gonna go out to eat before the baby comes’ etc and he’d always say yeah defo. When Mother’s day finally came all he said was ‘happy Mother’s day.’ I wasn’t too bothered by this because I didn’t care if we went out on the exact day. I was happy to go out to eat any day from the beginning of March right up until when the baby is due (April 19th). I didn’t care about actually going out to eat on the day of Mother’s day if that makes sense.
Surprise surprise it’s April 12th and we still haven’t gone out. There’s no way I’ll be able to make it to a restaurant as I have such bad pelvic pain and can barely walk. That’s not the reason we won’t be going though. No the reason we won’t be going is because he simply doesn’t care. It wasn’t a priority to him despite me continuing to ask him if we’d still be going out. All I wanted to do is celebrate my first ever Mother’s day by going out to eat as a family of 3 before our new baby came along. Especially after the horrible labour I had with DD and the fact that I still have long lasting migraines due to the spinal punctures. I would have even been content with a measly card just so I felt somewhat appreciated.
Maybe I’m blowing it out of proportion and it’s the hormones but it just feels so shitty when someone is clearly showing you that they don’t care about something that’s quite important to you. I’ve even had a bad day today as the eyebrow lady completely fucked up my eyebrows so maybe that’s why I’m really miserable. Not sure what I’m looking for here but it’s been good to rant as I’m just sat in my room crying to myself like a loner