Reluctant to tell family I’m pregnant

[Flatwhitepregnantlady]

Has anyone else struggled with this?

I’m 38 and this is a planned pregnancy but I hate the idea of telling my parents.

I’m not close to either of them. My mother has never shown any wish to be a grandparent, can be very disapproving of unmarried relationships and isn’t the biggest fan of my partner. I feel like there’s a high chance she’s going to react quite poorly. Even if she doesn’t she’s such a worrier that she’ll be convinced something will go wrong.

I was happy and excited to tell my DP’s family but I’m dreading this. Can anyone relate?

Can you do this by text or letter, or some other way that means you don't have to handle their response in real time? You can control how they feel about it but you can control how you protect yourself from it. I'm so sorry, OP, it sounds like such an unpleasant situation.

God, this could be me!! I'm dreading telling my mum. I'm 40 and already have two DDs (both over 15). This is a planned pregnancy, I had told her we were planning on trying (DP wants a baby) and she was totally negative, said that I hadn't enjoyed the early stages last time and it was ridiculous to have another one. Apparently I'm wasting my life and I could be doing so much more than 'just' having a baby. And I'm not married to DP, which is another problem in her mind.

DP's parents are thrilled for us and I'm enjoying sharing the pregnancy with them.

I don't plan on telling my mother for several weeks yet.

You have to pre empt the response

mum I have some great news - sets the tone nicely!

Any negativity just say ‘well we’re thrilled, speak later’ and cut her off.

I didnt tell my parents that I was having DC6 (planned but they have never approved of any of my pregnancies despite adoring all the kids) until I was 27 weeks.

I get it.

As it was I said "I am having a baby, I know you dont approve but I am telling you not asking for permission" I was probably more bolshy than I should have been, but they didnt say anything negative!

I’m planning to tell her by phone. It doesn’t help that I’ve really struggled with pregnancy emotionally so I don’t feel able to start with “I have some great news…” I think I really need a positive response at the moment but I can’t guarantee it will be forthcoming. I thought I’d feel ready by now (20 weeks) but I still don’t!