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Original poster

Garlic and alcohol smell on partner

20 replies

mirilou · 01/04/2022 14:24

Just hoping for some advice. I’ll preface by saying that I do seem to have a very strong sense of smell (not pregnant). The trouble is, I can’t stand the smell of my partner. He’s very clean, it’s not a personal hygiene issue, but he eats a lot of raw garlic accompaniments and drinks a lot of wine in the evenings. Both of these things seem to exude from the pores of his skin over night and the next day (it’s not his breath or clothes) it’s his skin, even after a shower it’s so strong. It’s got so bad recently that it actually makes me gag. But it’s so hard because there isn’t anything he can do about, it’s not as simple as cleaning teeth and showering as this makes no difference. And to ask him not to eat those things makes me seem controlling. I have explained I hate the smell, but I don’t think I should say therefore please don’t eat that. He does a detox every year for a month and the alcohol smell stops then. It’s making it hard to be close as I’ve had to sleep in the spare room recently as I just can’t seem to tolerate the smell. I need to find a way to manage my nose! Any tips of what he / I could do would be gratefully received!

OP posts:

gannett · 01/04/2022 14:29

How long have you been together? How did you ignore/get over his smell when you first got close?

I think being attracted to a partner's natural smell is pretty important in terms of compatibility. Not being able to tolerate it would be like being turned off by their face.

Sonaftersonafterson · 01/04/2022 14:49

Come on, it's tricky but you have to talk to him. Other people must also be able to smell it. It's not controlling, its something quite important!

Name99 · 01/04/2022 14:53

He eats raw garlic??

Original poster

mirilou · 01/04/2022 14:53

I wonder this myself. We have been together over a decade too! I think he’s started to eat differently in recent years. He likes to eat very late as in 9pm (late for me anyway) so I eat earlier with the children. In consequence, we eat different things. I don’t like garlic and I’ve heard you can smell it more if you haven’t eaten it yourself, so perhaps partly that. I think he drinks more now too and again I very very rarely drink these days. I wonder if it could be that? I can’t believe that my nose is getting more sensitive, everything else seems to get less finely tuned with age. It is getting a bit depressing really, especially as he, understandable, sees it as me being critical of him.

OP posts:

Original poster

mirilou · 01/04/2022 14:55

He says he can’t smell it and no one else can either. I think he thinks I’m making it up - I wish I was!

OP posts:

CanIPleaseHaveOne · 01/04/2022 14:56

I know what you mean!

Many years ago a friend of mine went through that - it was horrible. You could smell her across a room - stale alcohol and garlic/chilli/ etc. But she was not an excessive drinker - one or two glasses would set it off. Like your dh, it was not her breath, it was her entire body emitting this smell.

Funny thing is though, it went away. It does not happen now. Something changed. By that I mean she can eat garlic and drink wine but it no longer seeps out of every pore in her body!

Workinghardeveryday · 01/04/2022 14:57

How does he know others can’t smell it?

How does he eat raw garlic? I am intrigued!

Original poster

mirilou · 01/04/2022 14:58

What changed?! I’m glad that there’s hope, but also glad that I’m not crazy for being driven to gag by the smell. It’s honestly unbearable, even the following morning.

OP posts:

Cornettoninja · 01/04/2022 14:59

Raw garlic and wine? Yeah, there’s not much you can do about that other than ask him to lay off both. Some peoples smell is really affected by their diet - see how asparagus makes some peoples wee smell and not others.

Other than that you could try the vicks dabbed under your nose trick. Works for morticians.

Original poster

mirilou · 01/04/2022 15:00

The raw garlic is in these ‘fancy’ coleslaw type tubs mixed with various vegetables - it’s not coleslaw but some kind of pickled tub type thing. Gross, but very healthy apparently. So if I say please don’t eat it, I feel like I’m saying no to his super food! I’m going to have to get a mask for my nose aren’t I - at least they’re plentiful nowadays!

OP posts:

Original poster

mirilou · 01/04/2022 15:01

I’m going to get some vicks. Thanks for the idea. I won’t tell him who else it works for though!

OP posts:

Cornettoninja · 01/04/2022 15:02

Is it kimchi? He can get that without the garlic. Probably still smell a bit cabbage though.

Original poster

mirilou · 01/04/2022 15:04

Yes, amongst other tubs. I’m going to search a non-garlic version, although I think it’s the garlic he likes, but might give my nose a break a couple of days a week (he has it religiously every single night…..)

OP posts:

SailingNotSurfing · 01/04/2022 15:08

If this smell has suddenly surfaced, maybe there's something else wrong? I know plenty of red wine drinkers and garlic eaters (sono Italiano) and none of them smell bad the next day.

Original poster

mirilou · 01/04/2022 15:15

I wouldn’t say it’s suddenly come on, but he has found these new tubs of raw garlic etc recently which has made it worse. He seems pretty fit (says it’s the garlic…)

OP posts:

Mia400000 · 01/04/2022 15:25

Have you had covid, OP?

Instead of losing his sense of smell /taste, covid has heightened it for my DH. He now can't stand lots of smells that he used to be fine with.

But this is no help for you though. My DH has seen an ENT and everything but they can't help him unfortunately.

We're hoping things will improve with time.

Vapeyvapevape · 01/04/2022 15:35

Could you ask him to stop eating the garlic stuff just for a few days and see if it makes a difference.
How does he know no one else can smell it ? Can you ask someone that you know well (and will tell the truth) if they can smell it?

Moser85 · 01/04/2022 15:38

What about liquid chlorophyll? or there are other internal deodorizer tablets that might work but I'm not sure of the name

Vapeyvapevape · 01/04/2022 15:43

Could he try charcoal tablets ?

Oneonetheracehorse · 01/04/2022 15:59

I would hate this! I like garlic but the smell of stale garlic the next day on someone is horrendous. I once had a migraine starting, was already feeling queasy and had to go for a 1:1 meeting with a chap at his desk who smelt so strongly of stale garlic, wine and cigarettes that it finished me off, I vomited in the work loo and had to go home!
Anyway, if it was a regular thing, I'd have to speak to my husband and ask him to cut back on it. Perhaps he thinks it's just you as no one else has said anything - but who would? I didn't tell the chap who made me sick, he didn't know he smelt so strongly and what could I say? Good idea from a poster above to ask if he could cut it out for a few days and see if it makes a difference.

I don't believe anyone should control what a partner eats but I do think in some circumstances, people should be understanding of each other and compromise and perhaps this is a situation where your partner may need to?

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