My narcisstic ex threatened to take me to court for exposing him?

[Flowertree1212]

Hello everyone!

This situation just gets worse and worse and I'm at the end of my tether with it all. I was in a narcisstic relationship for a year, all the usual traits of love bombing but then comes the cheating and gaslighting. He has a sexual assault on a child caution (he told me because of my work) from his teenage years and it's messed him up, he is unable to sustain a proper relationship without using control and manipulation. I told him he needed to see a therapist and sort his past out which he agreed. We are in the same friendship circle so we done no contact but were socailising together after 2 months. Within 2 weeks of breaking up he gets with another young impressionable person like myself and i just watch from the side lines.

3 months later (beginning of this week) I found the narcissist on tinder! i video it, make a fake account and send it to the new partner. The new partner breaks up with them and makes contact with me and tells me all the same crazy stuff we've been through. Finally I've hit boiling point and I can't believe he's done this to someone else! He's never seen me angry but god I am now, I send him some nasty messages 'you're a psycho' 'get a therapist' 'no one will love you till you get help' etc. through the day and he responds to all of them. I send one final one and block him.

I meet up with the partner and we discuss all the similiarities of our experiences, it was so lovely to meet someone that knew what it felt like. I tell them that this all stems from their sexual assault caution on a child, he's deranged etc. and now he's on tinder again for the next poor sod!
That night I send one more message about giving him advice, 'get off tinder' 'youll hurt someone else etc'. (5 messages in total now over 3 days)
He replies and says look stop messaging me or I will get the authoirities involved. I say okay I will stop (i don't want this to carry on for anyones sake)

The next day the latest partner needs to pick up their keyboard and texts also 'I know what you're all about', i wonder what your friends will think. They aren't actually going to say anything but just wanted him to know they know.

He then calls her and says 'look you better shut up because I've been building a harassment case again (me) for the last 2 months!'

me and the latest partner are now freaked the hell out, this has only exploded in the last week. I never messaged him once he told me to stop and it really isn't that many messages, i don't know how he's building a case for the last two months, we've been good and I've just been watching from the sidelines.

Is he just trying to freak us into submission so we don't expose his past (which neither of us want) to protect his narcisstic mask? Everyone thinks he's an amazing guy.
Or can he actually do something against me? Down the civil or criminal route?
I finally felt free today after everything but yet again he's pulled this dark cloud over me I feel like I can never get away from him

I think you need to be more worried about a potential case of harassment against you rather than him being ’exposed’.

You seem to see yourself as some sort of avenging shit hot detective but you just sound like an unhinged stalker.

If he has gone to police already or is going to go to the police the first thing they would likely do is visit you and tell you to stop now before any legal mesures start. And if you didn’t stop then legal mesures would start. Since you stopped once he send you a message with the word ´harassment’ in it, it should go no further.

I recently called the police over exH harassing me. They gave me 2 options. Arrest him or get him to the police station and caution him.

He does have a criminal background from years ago though. Not sure if that makes a difference

I understand that you have been hurt and that he was an abusive boyfriend but you have been harassing him, and you really should not have catfished him on tinder just to mess up his new relationship-him cheating on her is none of your business.
He probably does have a case against you, he has not done anything to you after the break up, although he was abusive in the relationship. The best thing to do would be to block him on everything, stop hanging out with his social group, and his ex, get some hobbies and move on. Stop giving him so much space in your brain.

@daffyduckyduck

Sorry but you are just as bad as him! No matter what he's done - you have harassed him with these messages.

Block, move on before you get yourself into trouble. Absolutely no point in playing games with a narcissist

Clearly not as bad as somebody who has a caution for sexually assaulting a child.

It won't go to court because he won't want the caution to come out. Ignore him. Keep evidence of any threats, but avoid him other than that forever.

Leave him alone, block and move forward. Get yourself some counselling so you are able to form new, healthy relationships.

You are way over invested in this man. You’re finished, move on, stop contacting him, stop telling him whether he should be on dating sites, it is literally none of your business.

He is going to carry on dating. You can't stop him. Or 'save' the new girl friends. You will come across as the bitter ex.

There are many people who have been in your shoes. My ex moved In With his new gf weeks after meeting her. It's nothing to do with me. If I 'warned' her I would be considered jealous etc.

Leave him alone he will live his life. You live yours and be glad he isn't part of it

Half a dozen texts? No that's not a good case.
But if you continue after he tells you to stop that would be.

As the others have said, just stay away from him now. I would doubt the police/CPS would pursue something as low grade as this, but you've learned a lesson the hard way! If you do move in the same friendship circles, be careful to avoid him and don't talk to the others about him. Just pretend he never existed!