I never write on anything like this but I’m getting frustrated and I love how honest you all are so here it goes……I’ve known my friend for over 15 years and there’s always been a ‘special spark’ between us but we’ve both been in and out of relationships so nothing has ever happened and we even went a long time without speaking due to this. Our partners would get annoyed about our friendship so we just left it for a while…. We got back into contact a few years ago and it’s just been the odd message here and there just asking how the other is doing etc. I’ve since separated from my partner and am now a single mum to a little girl. My friend is also single so our messages have been a little more regular than normal. We have since both admitted that we’ve always liked each other and wishes one of us had said something back then. The messages, at times, has got a little steamy (him starting them) and we’ve met up a few times during the day. We get on so amazingly well and constantly laugh. Each time we’ve said goodbye, we have shared a cheeky kiss, which he has initiated. In his messages he’s always saying how much he’s liked me over the years and still does, is amazed nothing has happened, he wants to take me out on a ‘date’ etc. It’s been making me feel so happy as I’ve had a pretty rough time with relationships etc. We have made several plans to meet up and when it gets nearer the time, I don’t hear from him. He’s since apologised and said he’s been busy and doesn’t want to abuse our friendship. However, it takes a minute to send a quick message to cancel so I’m not naive. After we last met, we were messaging a few days after and all of sudden he’s stopped replying. Now I’m not one of these people to message again. He’s seen I’ve messaged him so if he wants to get in contact he can.
My question really is….am I wasting my time? I’ve pretty much been in love with this friend for such a long time and have always managed to get on with life knowing I couldn’t have him. I’m frustrated because he keeps telling me he has all these feelings yet doesn’t seem interested at all. I’ve said from the start I’m happy just being friends if that’s what he wants but he says he doesn’t. You’d think after so many years of us both feeling the way we do, something might have happened. I’ve been single for 3 years so it’s not a rebound for me and he’s been single for a long time too…..or maybe he’s speaking/seeing someone new? I just wished he’d be honest as I can accept it no matter what it is…..Do I just walk away from our friendship or leave it a while for him to contact me and if he doesn’t, I know where I stand?