Timeline of heartbreak…..

[Grenola]

Help….!
I need to know what I’m dealing with. It’s been years since I experienced this kind of heartbreak.
15 marriage over and I’m struggling with the intense physical pain it is giving me.

Talk to me about your experiences…. Give me hope.

(I have small kids for context)

I'm sorry but it really varies depending on your mental state at the time / other things going on / strength of your feelings. It's utter rubbish, I'm sorry. One day you will just notice you haven't been as sad for a while.

Do you have support from friends and or family op?
This makes a difference I think. I had to go on meds for a few months. Just took the edge off.
I began to feel a bit better after a few months. The first bit was so awful and just the thought of ever feeling that way again terrifies me.
The other thing I'd say is that it's not a linear thing. I mean overall it is but you may have days or weeks where you struggle with something you previously thought you'd dealt with.
Accept support and try to have faith thst you'll get through this. X

I’m about 4 months on from the end of my 9 year relationship and only just starting to be ok.

I cried every day for months, had panic attacks and at one point felt like my life wasn’t worth living . Luckily I have my DCs and I wouldn’t ever be able to do anything to hurt them so I carried on.

Now a few weeks further down the line and I have plenty of days where I don’t cry, I have thoughts of the future that aren’t all bleak and scary, and I’m beginning to see things in a more rounded way, eg it wasn’t all good or all shit, it was a bit of both and I can appreciate the good times and not be crushed by the bad. I still sometimes shed a tear when I remember something good or when I feel especially hard done by at being left after being nothing but loving towards him, but it’s now much more weighted towards good days than bad.

Hope you’re able to move on with your life and heal from the pain

I'm in a similar situation. It's awful. My heart goes out to you.

Massive sympathies OP. I'm 11 weeks post breakup. I was utterly heartbroken and devastated. I am doing better now. But I still miss him very much. There's lots of good advice on my "utterly utterly heartbroken" thread. Lean on your friends and be really really kind to yourself 💐

.

Thank you all xx

How are you feeling today @Grenola ?

It’s just a roller coaster isn’t it.
Didn’t sleep again last night, and feel sick this morning.

I am just wishing time forward to be able to cope abit better with it all

Thanks for asking xx

It is indeed. Grief of any sort isn’t linear, and make no mistake, this is grief as hard to bear as any loss. (I remember my mum saying that she felt more sorry for my aunt, whose husband had left her, than she did for herself when my dad died.)

You will have good days and bad, but as long as the general trajectory isn’t down you’ll come out of it. Take it easy on yourself and expect to be blindsided when you least expect it. But you’ll also have days when you feel unexpectedly ok and will realise that you’re healing.

My feelings since splitting with XP have been much like my crypto currency . There are days when it seems like you’re never going to recover. And then something else happens which makes it even worse. But then gradually without noticing things will get better.