Best friend loves me?

[cherryballs]

I’m 23 and I’ve been best friends with a guy, let’s call him Jack, basically since the womb lol. Our parents are close mates and we were born a month apart. We grew up having play dates, went to the same primary school and had lots of mutual friends growing up into adulthood. Our families spend a fair amount of time together including Boxing Day. Jack and I went to different universities and we missed each other a lot but our friendship remained strong, we kept in contact. He’s had girlfriends, I’ve had boyfriends, at the moment we’re both single. We have a strong friendship and have rarely fallen out.

We recently went to a friends gathering. Jack and I got pretty drunk and we crashed in my friends bed (this isn’t an unusual thing for us to share a bed at parties etc but nothing happens obviously) and I had one arm flung over him. We have a really close friendship and often say “love you”. In his drunken state he said this before we fell asleep and I said “love you too”. Jack then says “no, cherryballs, like LOVE you love you”. I just didn’t reply as I was a bit confused, then Jack says “oh god”. He then falls asleep.

This was on the weekend and I haven’t said anything. Everything has seemed normal and I’m not sure he remembers it. Do I bother saying anything? Thing is I actually don’t know how I feel about it, there’s been no indication of this in our whole friendship (I’ve had boyfriends, he’s got on well with them and vice versa). What do I do?

Do you have feelings too? Bring it up if you do in a jokey way and see his reaction. stay quiet if you don’t feel anything more

I agree with Redberries. If you don't have those feelings then best to stay quiet. If you do, then mention it when you're both sober.

Bet he does remember. Have a chat and see

You should read the book 'Where Rainbows End', or watch the film adaptation 'Love Rosie'. It's about a situation you describe and might offer some insight/inspiration.

Take time to figure out how you feel about him. I think he does love you (romantically) but probably feels like an idiot for mentioning it, and you not replying or reciprocating. If you don't have the same feelings, don't say anything. If you do, bring it up and see what he says. Keep in mind, it's as scary territory to navigate for him or you, so he might back track in embarassment - only you can be a judge of how honest he's being.

If you do feel the same way, hallejuah - could be fantastic development and I'm sure it's one both your families are hoping for. If you don't, well, it's a watch out that he may rebound quickly and drag another woman into your dynamic without really loving her like he does you. If you do notice that happening, it's best to be honest with him of your feelings so he doesn't wait around hoping you change your mind or worse still hurts someone else in the process. I think new partners for both of you could struggle to feel a priority or relevant, because you both are so close, so make sure that you're both honest and empathetic with them too.