Victim mentality

[NewDayNewLife]

Hi everyone,
I was wondering if anyone on here has succesfully overcome a victim mentality, and if so, how you did that?
I have a victim mentality and think some of it is now due to habit and being engrained. I have often felt that people just don't "get" me. I experienced friendship issues when younger (as most of us have) and remember really appreciating the sympathy I got from my parents. Later, as a young adult, I was in a toxic relationship with someone who didn't treat me well. I used to blame him entirely for it, but actually if I'm honest with myself I was definitely responsible for fuelling some of the drama. I have not openly lied to people about others, but in my head I often feel that another person's role is worse than it is. I'm not sure if some of my victim mentality stems from how I have responded to multiple disabilities.
I am now in my mid-20s and I really want to change for a few reasons. I'm realising how limiting it can make me feel. I had a previous thread on here, "When Friends Cancel" and I wonder if I've pushed people away without realising. It then creates a negative cycle.
Any advice about this would be appreciated. Thanks.

Yup. It changed when I put me in charge of myself, ie took responsibility for my emotions. So, if I'd been in a relationship that was bad for me, no blaming the other person, even if they were abusive, because I actively chose to be there. If I'd been hurt, it was my responsibility to move away from the source of the hurt, rather than spend my time wondering 'Why would they do that to me?'

People do all kinds of nasty, hurtful stuff. They'll never stop, and you'll never know why. You are responsible for only spending your time with the people with whom you feel nice, love, important, respected. You.

Take charge.

That's really helpful, thanks. I'm so glad it worked for you and you were able to stop blaming others.