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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Where do I stand legally?

1 reply

newstarts · 05/01/2008 21:16

Here is a little background:

I separated from my husband at the start of last year. I moved out of our jointly owned home with the children (my decision for a few reasons)
We are currently at a stand still with things and my solicitor is about to start court proceedings in relation to contact and finance. Basically he pays no maintenance as he keeps changing his story as to when he sees the children (he currently sees them twice a week during the day as staying contact is with held due to him moving a lodger in and the children having no where to sleep) but he tells his solicitor various stories ranging from him never having them to him having them more than me. He is now starting to mess around when he sees them e.g. telling me the day before that he can't see them etc. However there is actually no contact agreement in place at the moment because he refuses to agree to anything that is proposed. The house has not been sold yet as he simply refuses to agree to any split. He has basically told everyone who will listen including my own family that he will drag the whole thing out without agreeing to anything for as long as he possibly can in the hope of breaking me financially.

My problem is this, I have been offered a job @ 200 miles away. Financially it would make my life a lot easier as the pay is almost the same as I am on, the rent is more than £200 a month less and the childcare is cheaper. I have no ties here and in fact moving would bring me closer to family members. Do I have to wait until everything has been agreed by a court or does my ex have to have a say in it. I am more than happy to drive the children down every other weekend to see their dad (he doesn't drive). I realise that it would be an upheaval for the children but in the long run I think it will be for the best for all of us.

Any advice on where I stand greatly appreciated.

OP posts:
Alambil · 05/01/2008 22:32

I don't think that as long as you stay in the same country, he can do anything to stop you living wherever you want.

Do you have a lawyer? I'd ring and double check on Monday but I'm pretty sure if you are in the same country, you can be wherever you want

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