Getting into relationship when you have a baby?

[mushroomroll]

My ex DP left me not long after I had my 8 month old. I started dating someone (just meeting for coffee or lunch 1-2 times a week) a couple of months ago. He is kind, generous, and obviously knows about my daughter and we've gone for walks in parks with her in the pram etc.
Has anyone got with anyone while their kids were young? Did it last, did they take them on like their own? Or was it a bad idea?
Just looking for people who've had personal experience of a similar situation really. Thank you.

Bumping for you.

I had 3 kids when I met my husband. They were all young, the youngest 7 months. We're married now and have another child together. He loves and treats them all the same and is their dad. I never had men not want to date me because I had kids but in reality I had to be more picky because there were kids involved and not just me.

My youngest stepdaughter was only 2 when I started dating her mum. We have one of our own now and it's tricky to say if I feel exactly the same for them or not, but I definitely love her deeply and would sacrifice for her as I would for my biological daughter. The fact she was so young and I've been part of her development has definitely helped in that sense.

I also love my older stepdaughter, who was six at the time, but again it's different. She remembers me not being there and even though we're very close I'll always be someone who popped into her life after her permanent memories formed. Still, she's a moody preteen now and even in her angriest moment hasn't used the "you're not my real dad!" line so I guess we're doing well!

But honestly, I think it's easier for a potential stepdad if the kid is really young. And yes, stepdad is a term that seems outrageous to think about after only a couple of months, but if you're forming a relationship you need to look long-term right?

If things start to get serious with him, talk about how you see his role going forward. Don't just assume you're on the same page. Make sure his parenting philosophy is roughly in line with yours. Never just assume you're aligned on these things!

No, I don’t know how people manage this, I’ve been single for 5 years now and I couldn’t imagine dating someone when I had a young baby (ex left when I was pregnant) not judging just don’t know how people get into the head space of dating again or find the time! I’m kind of jealous as I’ve been single way too long.

I was only 18 when I became a single parent and
My son was 6 months old
I was living at home and had a full time job
I met someone else within 2 months
Fell head over heels in love
He's the only dad my eldest son has ever known
We had 3 more children
It lasted 26 years

It can work

Thank you all much appreciated xx

It's not impossible but will be alot more tricky to date, Depends how old you are, in your 20s there will be lots of single blokes around looking for women who don't have children due to the restrictions that they bring to dating and the family lifestyle element, but as you get older then people will likely have kids and blokes be more accepting to the idea.
Generally blokes will pass if they are not interested in dating someone who allready has children, but there are those who will use as a bit of fun, it's trying to weed them ones out that is a problem

Yes, however we had dated in the past, reconnected during lockdown as friends. Having a 'past' and a shared history is why it works. He supported me during my pregnancy and ended up being my birthing partner! Otherwise, I don't think I would trust anyone else or have the time/head space to get to know someone or give the relationship the attention it deserves to reach intimacy.