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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Mid 30's with a 20 month old, no friends !

2 replies

passmethelatte · 14/03/2022 21:53

Hi, I didn't know whether this was the right subject to start this under, but here I go. I had my DD in 2020, we were in and out of lockdown, I couldn't take her to baby groups and when they reopened I was still a bit apprehensive. My closest friends (I can count them on one hand) don't have children and I just feel like I've never really had that closeness that I see them having with other people. To be honest I've never been one of "the girls", never had a group of girlfriends, I like going out occasionally but don't often now. My question is, I would love to make friends, with other Mums but I'm not sure how to this late on in my life (mid thirties)? I have anxiety which also doesn't help. I think I'm just coming to terms with the fact that my family are the people I really talk and confide in and to my fiancé and they are enough. I just can't help getting a little empty feeling when I see groups of friends who have been friends forever.

OP posts:
Champagne16378 · 14/03/2022 23:10

Hi OP,

In my experience it can take a good while to 'find your tribe' as it were, so keep persevering. Also bear in mind that it can take some time for friendship to develop beyond the friendly chit chat, so once you meet a few mums who you can chat to, give it time to develop! Are you going to playgroups (like in church halls etc) and toddler classes, where you can meet other mums? I've also used the Mush app to meet other mums. I hear Peanut is good too. It can be lonely being a mum (not sure if you're a stay at home mum or working part/full time?) so there are many many women who also feel like you. You're not alone!

SunflowerTed · 14/03/2022 23:13

Please don’t feel that Being in your 30s is a barrier to making new friends. I’ve got my best girlie gang going since I got with my husband when I was 38! Granted I’m sociable but I’m not in touch with anyone I went to school with or was friends with in my 20s (bar one person) x

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