Finding love with kids

[Singlemummy444]

I’ve been single for 7 years and recently up sticks and moved my family away to be closer to relatives and escape an abusive Ex who let my children down time and time again with drugs, alcohol etc!

I started a new life and it’s the best thing I’ve done for my children they are thriving!

Me on the other hand thought maybe just maybe I might find love too now that we are settled! I met a man through my family and we dated for 4 months, unfortunately the relationship ended, he is a single father to a 4 yr old only child and was extremely over protected of her, if my children didn’t share he would get annoyed however if his daughter didn’t share then that was ok! I tried to explain siblings and the rivalry that comes with it but it was not good enough! His parting words were I love you but I can’t stand the children fighting!!

Fair enough however my question to all you single mummies out there is have you found love with kids or should I wait til the kids are 16 to even contemplate this!! My children will always come first and if this is what it takes then so be it. But if you’ve found love I’d love to hear your stories and how you made it work! I’m 43 so not getting any younger and my children are 6 and 8

Dont
Heal urself first love urself instead of trying to find love.
The right person will come along
Hang in there xx

I found the love of my life last April, with my 4 & 7 year old in tow. He loves them so much...and I love his 9year old daughter too. Yes they fight, yes they stress us out but we are a unit and sort them out as a team. I promise it's possible to find love with children xxx

Do you want anymore children? If not and your happy with your lot, as long as you are confident, self secure, have an active life with hobbies or interests and are self sufficient maybe something casual would suit you better and later down the line when the kids are older look for a relationship then.

Just an option, because your single, doesn’t mean you can’t ever have company.

I met my partner nearly 3 years ago. And no it's not been plain sailing with the children, he's got two and I've got two. There have been points I've disliked his and he mine. they have loved each other and hated each other. But we are always balanced and kind to them all. And ultimately we've concluded kids grow and change we love each other enough to support each other and all the kids.

I'm only saying this because it's not always raindows and sunshine and it can be hard work. But totally worth it. We've just moved in together and got a puppy, so I guess we're in it for the long haul!

What you’re describing is textbook issues of dating with kids. Or with blending. It’s fraught with emotional, logistic and financial difficulty. Absolutely fraught. It takes patience and maturity on some kind of heroic level for it to work (and more often than not it seems it doesn’t work, I don’t know whether most folk have what it takes). So much more of a nightmare than pre-kids.

Doesn stop us trying though.

Hope you do meet someone worthy of you who can mesh with your family and add to it