Should I continue?

[Milou89]

Hi !
First of all, english is not my first language so I appologize for the spelling errors. So, I met this guy a few months ago, he is a coworker. I realized in january that I was attracted to him. He is an interested guy. Since the last two months, I get to know him more, we talk more often. I think he may be interested in me too, the way he looks at me, the little smiles, the blinking...All these things are very fun. I am really enjoying myself right now and the long days at work are more pleasant since january. I don't want to push things too far for the moment. I'm still learning to know him. But, yeah, I can see myself in a relationship with this man someday. But, last night, we were talking about the fact that my parents had me late in their life. And he said "I'm gona have my kids late in life too". We are both 32 and I'm sure he was refering to the fact that he is back to studies at the very moment (and working at the same time). The problem is....that I dont want kids. I'm sure of it. I knew it for a moment. Should I continue to flirt with him ? I am not ready to talk about my feelings with him....Since he said that, I feel a pain in my heart. I dont want to loose him and I dont want him to loose his time with me...

I think you're jumping the gun a bit and need to slow down. You don't even have a relationship and if you two do ever hook up, just enjoy it. Then after a few dates (if you actually have any) mention it then and see what his response is.

” And he said "I'm gona have my kids late in life too".”

That may also be his way of saying he doesn’t want kids but is assuming that you (as a woman) would. I’d mention that you don’t want kids if a similar conversation crops up in the future. You never know, he might be relieved to hear you say that!

So yeah, carry on flirting

Also, good luck!

Continue to flirt if you want but it seems very unlikely to me that anything will happen. look elsewhere.

I’d even ask him if he has any nice friends who are ready to settle down If he’s nice his friends are likely to be nice too.

Why do you think nothing will happen ? Just curious

I laughed a bit at 'the blinking' haha xD what is he blinking 'I fancy you' in morse code ?

Tbh op a guy saying they don't want kids later in life to you can actually just be his way of indicating he is not looking for a 'serious' relationship. Not that relationships with kids aren't serious of course. But a lot of guys just assume we are all baby crazy and yhey need to tell us that it won't happen with them.

But it could be him saying he just wants a bit of fun rn.

He could even mean 'I dont want kids at all but I dont want to say that incase it scares you off' but context wise I would expect that more once you were actually dating.

I don't want kids either and in that situation I would have replied 'I don't want them at all' and laughed.

There's no need to tell a random that you dibt want kids though. If you start dating and it begins heading towards a serious relationship then it's wise to say.

As is, no need to overthink.

*doesn't want kids until later in life

Fs
*without kids

Calm down. You’ve flirted a couple of times.

For the blinking, I made a mistake, I was meaning "wink"

” what is he blinking 'I fancy you' in morse code ?”

@Pinkbonbon – yes, in a way. Rapid blinking can be a sign of nerves, which he might be feeling if he’s attracted to the OP but he’s a bit shy. Your comment made me chuckle and I don’t think I’ll be able to keep a straight face if I see rapid blinking in the future (and probably not at all helpful or reassuring for the guy when he sees me suppressing a chuckle!)

@Milou89 – ahh, now, winking. That’s a whole other thing. Winking can be a sign of a player – someone who’s a bit TOO sure of himself and has cottoned on to the fact you like him and is “playing” on that to see if he can draw you in. Proceed with caution.

Unless it’s a conspirational wink (like if you’re sharing an “in” joke or something).

For the winking, I don't think that he is too sure of himself, he is a quiet guy

It would be worse if he had said he wants them soon. See where it goes, nothing ventured, nothing gained.