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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

comments on my clothes

32 replies

shellyr1989 · 11/03/2022 12:01

Am i being too sensitive or is this banter? my boyfriend regulary comments on my clothes in a neative jokey way eg we were going to mass last week and i had a pair of plain chelsea boots on nothing weird and he said oh u look lovely but i seen him glance at the boots and then he says even with your little cowboy boots on in a snide way.followed by im just joking. other comments he makes are about how tight my jeans are(normal skinny jeans) or asks did my jeans srink in the wash..i have a pair of black jeans with one small rip on the knee and the comment on that was how cheap they look..(river island 50 quid jeans)or oh i like your jumper..when its obvious he doesnt by his facial expression..i dress decent in my eyes absolutely nothing wrong with what i wear for my age.. sometimes when i eat when im finished the comment will be god u were hungry.. im a size 10 so not over weight.. he complements me a lot also but i just feel these comments are happening to often.. i called him out on it big time yday and he says he feels disgusted that he has made me feel insecure but i dont know how to feel. he is very apologetic but to me he has to mean these comments to say them..we dont live together

OP posts:
MarbleQueen · 11/03/2022 15:36

Disgusted my arse.

I’m pretty confident he’s only ever said these things to you in private.

ThisBloodyNoiseInMyHead · 11/03/2022 15:44

He's a twat, isn't he? Get a nicer boyfriend

iwishu · 11/03/2022 15:56

It's negging. So disrespectful to you. I had a boyfriend like this, didn't last because his comments irritated me too much.

Sunnytwobridges · 11/03/2022 18:48

He sounds like a passive aggressive prick. I dated one like this and it fucked with my self esteem. Not worth it.

loveyoutothemoon · 11/03/2022 21:04

Definitely negging.

I'd never heard of the word until recently, heard about it on here. My ex was the same.
Took he micky out of what I wore (said he was only joking).
Commented on what people wore all the time when we were out and about (only women though).
Perving over women all the time on TV.
Took the mickey over something that I was very concious about
Was always very apologetic every time I brought stuff up (but woud still do it over and over again, especially the above comment).

He was definitely trying to bring me down deliberately. I binned him off as it got so irritating, didn't want to waste more time on the loser. Figured it was because he was really insecure.

It'll get worse OP. Don't waste your time my lovely.

Bananalanacake · 11/03/2022 22:04

Next time he says "were you hungry" you say "yes I'm getting myself a donut and 3 mars bars" then laugh at his reaction.
Whatever you do don't let him move in with you.

NameGoesHere · 12/03/2022 07:02

Why would you put up with this

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