annoying in-laws

[mumsway]

in a bit of a dilemma. dd is 18 months old and starting to copy some things we say.

FIL has always used language like c*p and s*t and uses it in front of dd in general conversation. i know its not really swearing but i don't like it. i can swear like anyone else but there is a time and a place i think.

also if she puts something in her mouth he will say 'take it out of your gob'. i make a point of saying 'take it out of your mouth'. i know she might pick up these words when she gets older and starts school but i don't want her coming out with them now.

another thing that MIL, FIL, BIL and great in-laws do when they visit is stand around dd when she is eating and keep saying 'give me bit' holding out there hands, so then dd passes them her food. so i then have to say to dd 'no you eat it'. also MIL will pick dd up when she has eaten and playfully pretend to throw her away. on numerous occasions i have had to say 'be careful she's not sick on you' at which point she will say 'better not do that anymore'.

should it be up to me to say something to dh's family or talk to dh about it first. i don't want to cause any arguments especially with dh.

we had an issue with FIL earlier on in the year about something else, and i asked dh to have a word with him about it. i felt that FIL was funny with me for a while because he would have known that i asked dh to say something. (won't go into it because it has been resolved).

don't know if i'm being really trivial about these things because everything they have done since dd was born seems to annoy me. dd is there only grandchild at the moment.

I'd ask fil to mind his language around your dd but tbh I think you might be a bit sensitive about the whole food issue, unless of course they are hanging around at every meal time! My il's always try and interact with my dd when I'd rather she concentrated on eating/sleeping etc, but I think they are so excited to actually have a grandchild that they can't bear to leave her alone for 5 seconds. Its something you might just have to grin and bear for a while

The swearing thing has to be stamped down on asap, although don't make a big song and dance, as DD will realise that C & S are Words of Power.
One thing i use with DP, as he's terrible for minor swear words in front of kids is "Oi, there's kiddies' bikes outside!"...from "Phoenix Nights" (Peter Kay used it to stop someone swearing, when there were no kids actually present).
It's jokey, but gets the point across.
The food "give me a bit" thing.....hmmmmmmmmmmm....if this was done in isolation, would it annoy you as much?
I think that's a bit secondary to the swearing and the "gob" issue, unless it reduces the amount of food she's getting.