Don’t know how to title it

[GeneLovesJezebel]

So I’ve written on here before about my DH drinking a bottle of wine a night. Some say he’s alcoholic, some don’t. He’s never ‘drunk’ or violent.
Today I’ve found he’s drunk a bottle of beer and hidden the bottle in the recycling. Then drunk a bottle of wine.

You won't ever win with an alcoholic and there's a very good chance you'll lose yourself in trying.

He's had a beer and a wine this morning?! Very worrying behaviour and hiding the evidence is a big sign of problem drinking.

No, not this morning. Always at night.
If he’d had it and I’d known I wouldn’t have said anything anyway. I’m past that stage, I just let him get on with it.
I think hiding it is a new low.

Hiding Alcohol is often a sign of alcohol addiction. My dad was a functioning alcoholic. Never acknowledged as such by him and never mentioned by my mum until one day when I came to see them she took me into the kitchen and said 'your dad says he hasn't got a problem but I've found whisky bottles hidden in wellies in the garage. When he's hiding the alcohol he definitely has a problem' A lot of things suddenly became noticeable to me then. How, although never drunk, he always had a glass of whisky by his side when I visited. How he never wanted to go out in the evenings for special occasions ext. I think that if you suggest your DH has a problem' on the evidence of one hidden bottle he definitely won't acknowledge it. If there's a problem he will only become more careful in covering up. Either this is a new first, or he has done it before and you haven't noticed. I think you need to quietly observe for a while. Present evidence when you have it of more dependancy on alcohol. Do it in a quiet, calm way. If you wish to support him have information ready about local AA meetings and other support. There r also meetings for family supporting alcoholics if that would help you. None of them are any good until and unless your DH is prepared to admit he has a problem'. Above all, look after yourself op. 💐

Ask him why he's hiding it? He's probably ashamed. Ask him if he thinks he has a problem.

Hiding it confirms he has a problem. It shows that he knows he's overstepped a mark, and wants to hide it from you.

Which leads me to - once someone is hiding stuff from you, you know you can no longer trust them. Always assume there is more to it than you're aware of. Also, hiding is similar to lying. It basically means he's willing to keep stuff from you.

It's a sad fact that addiction and lying go hand in hand. And as one gets worse, so does the other.

And there is nothing you can do to stop his addiction or his lying.

I don’t really care why he hid it, he’d probably blame it on me, I just wish he’d go away. I’m fed up of being disappointed.

He tells little lies about other stuff, and can be a bit devious. I wrote recently about him hiding stuff he’s bought for his hobby.

What's your situation? Kids? Mortgage? Do you work?

If he'll just blame you I'm guessing the relationship is in a bad place?

Yes it is.