Sex with ex dh

[Onelastgo22]

Dh and I seperated middle of last year.
I still love him very much, but things had become too much and I said we should seperate.
I have always left the space for him, to step up and do better.
He has let me down, alot.
We got close over Christmas, but he did the usual and let me down again.
We were intimate on Sunday, at his instigation.
Since then I can't help but feel used.
I thought he had maybe heard and understood my needs, which I have made really clear, but since then he has been quite cold.
I don't understand.
Should I raise this with him, or accept he has treat me as a booty call and just ignore and try to move on?
I still feel so married, I can't let go.

@SandyY2K

We have 2 dc and I have facilitated frequent contact in the home so I've felt very much married.

Next time when he comes round to see the kids, you need to go out and leave him to it

Say you'll be back at X o'clock. Don't tell him where you're going. Just go. You being in the house makes it easier for him.

No - he needs to not enter OP's home at all.

It is totally unnecessary. She should not be facilitating this twat.

Hate to bring this up OP but did you use protection as there is a very high chance he won’t have been celibate whilst living apart.

You need to bring it to an end as you will never heal until you do.

In my head, I always hoped he would step up, so I've never really thought of us as being over.

I love him and I miss being a family unit, or at least the idea of it is very hard to let go of.

I've stayed loyal and faithful during our separation. I wanted my marriage to work.

I just can't get over that after 16 years of loyalty, he has reduced me to somewhere his bits warm, when I thought he wanted things to get better. I feel so worthless and foolish.

The main reason I gave him for wanting to seperate was that I felt he didn't respect me very much. I guess I was right.

*somewhere to keep

No we didn't use protection. I did has if he had been with anyone else and he said no, but who knows.

It’s not your fault OP, it’s his. I think you can’t take his word for it. He will always say no. You are putting your sexual health at risk by sleeping with him as well as damaging your mental health.

How do I even start to maintain a healthy co parenting dynamic after this?
We've spent so much time together, but I don't feel like I want to anymore, but I don't want my kids to feel the impact of that either 😩