Tell me about your happy relationship

[UpToMyEye]

I think lots of us don’t realise just how unhappy we are as we think everyone else is too
Men are useless, they’re messy, they’re thoughtless, the football is more important than anything etc - these are messages we’re fed from being small

And obviously people don’t talk about the happiness, the small moments that mean so much; the kiss on the head before they leave for work, the buying things they know you like, the comfort they provide, the wink across a crowded room to let you know they’re always thinking of you

So happy ones - what are the things in your relationship that mean the most, that make you never doubt they’re the right person, that provide you comfort and security and make you feel desired?

What makes a happy relationship?

My life is far better having DH in it. That said he works on another continent full time. We see each other as much as we can. I'm currently about to take a flight home from the Middle East as I've just spent five precious days together. We love and care for each other deeply but both have our own lives and goals to fulfil. Takes lots of planning and is not easy. But we seem to make it work

We have a very happy relationship. It's had its ups and downs, mainly caused by me but we were 18 (him) and 21 when we got together. We got married last year after 19 years together. We communicate well, consider each other's feelings, make allowances and there's a lot of give and take over things we want to do for instance we moved away as he wanted and moved elsewhere when I wanted. He's not someone who brings me flowers every week but he is really thoughtful. We are united in our parenting. Have a laugh and take the piss out of each other. Lots of hugs and kisses and really great sex although not as often as we'd both like it is very good.

What an amazing thread. That is all.

Love this thread!

A lovely positive thread.

My DP is the best dad to our DC first and foremost. He has patience in abundance and is so actively engaged in our children’s lives.

He is incredibly affectionate and thoughtful and whilst he’s not the best of cooks he really does try and I appreciate that so so much.

He’s also pristine wrt cleaning and does his absolute fair share of household chores and the general drudgery.

But the main one, complete and absolute trust. He is just a good guy.

He's my absolute best friend we laugh and joke and still have fun together after many years . He's got a heart of gold and will do absolutely anything for me and our kids nothing is too much trouble . He adores me, even though I look completely different than when we met , he still makes me feel like I'm the most beautiful woman he's ever seen . He never leaves for work without giving me a kiss and a hug and telling me he loves me . My absolute favorite place is wrapped in his arms .

How I feel about my husband - what our relationship is like - is best summed up by David Rose's wedding vows in schitts creek:

"I've never liked a smile as much as I like yours. I've never felt as safe as I do when I'm with you. I've never known love, like I have when we're together. It's not been an easy road for me. But... knowing that you will always be there for me at the end of it, makes everything ok"

I genuinely think my husband is the kindest and best man I've ever known (no he is not perfect, nobody is). And the sex is incredible which doesn't hurt.

@spacehardware Quick question for the group; can I use a quote from Schitts Creek for my wedding vows, and if I do will Schitts Creek fan DP notice?

Yes you absolutely can!!

Unless it's one of moira's put downs ("did David say something to upset you? He can be very cruel but it's all fear based")

DH is kind. He is the kindest man I know and never complains about tough times or being asked to do anything. He is my rock, and I love him more than anything. What I particularly love about him is that I know without any shadow of a doubt that he loves me, more than anyone else in the whole world. He loves me more than my parents have loved me, more than my children love me (they are mostly grown, and doing their own thing, meeting their own loves and that is fine).

DH would do anything for me. From rubbing my feet to making me coffee. To the gardening/maintenance of the house. To cleaning the toilet. I mean, he's not perfect. He doesn't notice any of the jobs that need doing, but if you ask him to do something he does so willingly and uncomplainingly. Which means a lot.

He has never let me down in nearly 25 years. He's my other half. He has supported my career, been proud of me, and cheerfully pulled his weight throughout the marriage, from small DC to adults. We've had some really tough times and he's never wavered or not been there when I needed him.

I am in a very happy relationship and couldn't imagine life any other way.

Dp is an amazing step dad to my children and a fantastic daddy to our little boy.
Hes never judged me for my past.
I know no matter what he has my back.
We cook together, game together. Love the same music. Have the same sense of humour. The sex is incredible and he always makes sure we enjoy it equally. We are in the process of buying a home together and plan to marry eventually. We've had a issues. His mates are idiots for example and have done nothing but drag my name through the dirt for the most ridiculous reasons but he defends me and protects me and we've managed to make it work.

I've had my fair share of shitty relationships. One including a 14 year long marriage. I know they aren't perfect all the time but it definitely takes two to make it work.

In a new relationship (4 months only) after a marriage, a long term relationship and another 3 months of seeing someone.
I started believing I'm just not good at relationships until I met my current partner and realised I CHOSE wrong partners.

My exes would be physically attractive, charismatic men who flattered me with words and grand gestures. There would be a lot of excitement but also a lot of upset. I felt I had to prove my worth to them and sooner or later had to change to meet their expectations.

This relationship feels different. My current partner is predictable, grounded, calm, kind, generous. He makes me feel safe. His words match his actions. He cherishes me just as I am. He made my everyday life easier by fixing a few things at my home and helping me to make a few decisions about my work.
There were no major butterflies in my stomach when we met; instead, a slow, gradual process of getting to know each other.

The more I get to know him the more I appreciate his presence in my life.

We can disagree but we don't hurt eachothers feelings. He's always kind and generous. We forgive each other when we forget something or make a mistake but mistakes are relatively minor.

Been together 20 yrs