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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Is a valentines date a big deal?

8 replies

Hpmummy19 · 14/02/2022 14:04

So I've been "talking to" a guy for about 6 weeks now, been going well, consistently texted/spoke daily and met up 1-2 times a week, it been pretty chilled and casual and not once have we had any discussion about if we are looking for a relationship / what future there could be etc and I've been totally fine with that in all honesty. Just been taking it really slow and casual. But he has asked to take me out for valentines which I have agreed to, I don't know if I'm over thinking it but I'm now thinking is that a bit more coupley? I mean we have been on dates so it's not like it's anything new but with it being Valentine's Day I just feel it's like extra step... I honestly hadn't even thought about where it was going, I've been really enjoying sleeping with him etc, I do see potential in him and I do like him and not really interested in seeing anyone else, do I have that "conversation" with him tonight? Or just keep my mouth shut? Is it not that deep that he's invited me out tonight? Don't know why I feel nervous about it!!

OP posts:
Gilda152 · 14/02/2022 14:05

It's not that deep ☺️

EvenMoreFuriousVexation · 14/02/2022 14:10

Did he actually say "can I take you out on valentines day" or similar, or was it "do you fancy going to X on Monday?" If the latter, I'd assume he hadn't clocked the actual date.

If the former, I'd probably ask him during the date what he thought of v day in general (some people feel obliged to take a newish partner out regardless of how they actually feel about the person or the ocassion.)

I would probably choose and write out a small v card to keep in my handbag and produce if he gave me one 😉

Hpmummy19 · 14/02/2022 21:39

Update - went for the meal, was nice had a nice time but then he didn't invite me back to his? He said "I would have invited you back but the place is a bit of a mess" I just brushed it off said that's fine etc and see you soon. Obviously I know it doesn't alwayssss have to be about sex but it took me by surprise as we started off seeing eachother "casually / hooking up" !
Surprised he invited me out for a meal but no hook up on Valentine's Day 🤷🏼‍♀️ am I odd for thinking that's a bit strange?

OP posts:
NotaCoolMum · 15/02/2022 00:34

You are WAY overthinking EVERYTHING. You had a nice evening out- is it not a good sign that he’s wanting to take you out?

RedCandyApple · 15/02/2022 00:35

So you think he was hooking up with someone after?

Hpmummy19 · 15/02/2022 15:13

@RedCandyApple

So you think he was hooking up with someone after?
No that hadn't even crossed my mind to be honest, I took it that he'd lost interest or something or maybe didn't really fancy me last night 🤣
OP posts:
CrimbleCrumble1 · 15/02/2022 19:37

Go with the flow, you’re overthinking everything.

Offside · 15/02/2022 19:40

Overthinking it. You should be happy that he enjoys your company enough to spend time with you without it having to lead to sex.

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