WHAT DO I DO?

[Abbydoo]

Me and my partner have been together about 7 years, have a house and 2 young kids together. As usual relationships do, everything has just fizzled out. No love, no romance, nothing.

We have tried many times to change what we’re doing and it never lasts long. We just seen so bored of each other.

He always tells me he loves and I know he does but I just don’t think I feel the same way. It’s got to the point where I just don’t want to touch/kiss him.

When it comes to sex, I’ve told him before I don’t just get in the mood as soon as he says ‘can we have sex’ I say I need some sort of flirting/affection to actually get me somewhere which he never does. Also when I say I don’t want it if I’m too tired from dealing with the kids etc he gets so angry sometimes and takes it out me and makes me feel guilty saying that i don’t love him so I feel pressured into it. I think this has made everything worse as I’m starting to absolutely dread when he starts to get horny coz I know if I say no it will turn into a huge argument.

I do all the housework, i do everything for the kids, all the cooking, everything. I feel like I’m too scared to leave though as I will have no money and will be alone even more than I am now.

What are peoples opinions? Should I talk to him for the millionth time or should I leave? It’s been on my mind for ages and it’s starting to really get me down and stressed.

Separate!?

Why do you do everything around the house? Do you work?

WHAT DO I DO? Leave my dear, leave and do not look back.

I’m on maternity leave at the moment so I do everything which is reasonable when he’s at work but it’s the same at the weekend too. He does help out with the older child at the weekend but the baby he doesn’t do anything for.

This could have been me a couple of years ago. The difference for me was when I said about just ‘can we have sex’ not getting me in the mood and the fact that I needed something more, he did listen to me, and things did really improve.
I think the fact you have already said this quite clearly, and he hasn’t listened to you, says a lot.

Personally I would look to go, but I would make it clear that I was considering this (if I felt safe to do so). I’d give him a chance to change knowing the consequences, and if not then I’d follow through and leave. Nothing is worth being unhappy forever.

Easier said that done though, I know, particularly with children thrown into the mix. Good luck with whatever you decide.

absolutely dread when he starts to get horny coz I know if I say no it will turn into a huge argument. I do all the housework, i do everything for the kids, all the cooking, everything

So you’re his mother & he throws tantrums. No surprise your respect and passion for him have fizzled out.

Life is too short to dread. Can your family help?