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Original poster

At what point are you sleeping with a new man?

11 replies

Shinydiscoballs1 · 11/02/2022 19:22

Who goes for the 3 date rule? Who goes more for time?
Done 4 dates but it's only been 1 week!
It's not that I'm going by any 'rule' but I know with myself and I don't want to feel like ive rushed into it

OP posts:
fenellastripe · 11/02/2022 19:25

If it was someone I'd known for a while before dating, and I was strongly attracted to him - 1st date!
If it's a new date then I'd definitely need at least 3 dates to try to get to know him. Although with some men you never really know them.
A week! Four dates in a week! Wow OP.

Original poster
Shinydiscoballs1 · 11/02/2022 19:31

I know it's mad, he's been a mutual friend for years

OP posts:
RedCandyApple · 11/02/2022 19:33

There was a thread on this a few days ago which might be helpful, I haven’t had sex in 5 years so there is no way I’m jumping into bed with someone on the first night it will be a long time 😂

RedCandyApple · 11/02/2022 19:34

Long thread on this the other day

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/4473852-How-many-dates-before-DTD?pg=1

fenellastripe · 11/02/2022 19:37

@Shinydiscoballs1

I know it's mad, he's been a mutual friend for years
That's crazy OP. You go from being friends for years to suddenly dating and then four times in a week!? There's hope for me yet. Got any tips?
Original poster
Shinydiscoballs1 · 11/02/2022 20:45

It's not how I expected it to work out! I posted a thread last week about how long do you give it if you don't fancy someone straight away as I was so worried about this date.
We connected straight away and get in so well, I've enjoyed his company ever since and now I'm really feeling the physical lust as its sometimes a slower build for me.
I don't have any tips as this is all new to me and I just want to get it right. I was just myself and I think he was too and we seem to match pretty well (so far...)
I'd literally love to ride him all night but I'm also one for rushing into things and then wishing I'd just chilled out a bit.

OP posts:
sassbott · 11/02/2022 20:50

When I want to. And when I feel emotionally robust enough to do so, knowing that if they then ghost me/ suddenly go weird on me having DTD, that I’ll be ok.

I won’t sleep with anyone for some time yet because I’m not in that place. I could probably go on 20 dates and wouldn’t be ready. But when I am? I’ll go for it.

EvenMoreFuriousVexation · 11/02/2022 21:42

I decided to wait til date 2 once, purely because I had a period on date 1. It was the longest 48hrs of my life.

I usually aim to fuck on the first date. I have a very high bar for sex and if they can't meet it, I'd rather know early on so we're not wasting each other's time.

Original poster
Shinydiscoballs1 · 12/02/2022 10:40

@EvenMoreFuriousVexation

I decided to wait til date 2 once, purely because I had a period on date 1. It was the longest 48hrs of my life.

I usually aim to fuck on the first date. I have a very high bar for sex and if they can't meet it, I'd rather know early on so we're not wasting each other's time.

I love this. I think it's been drummed into me from a young age to keep the guy waiting at least a few weeks if you want him as a keeper. Even though this is rubbish and not true, I still would feel regretful rushing in if that makes any sense. I also love the build up as it makes me feel like I'm 15 again! So far he's brushed the side boob first date and now at full on over clothed boob grope now 😂
OP posts:
flipperdoda · 12/02/2022 10:54

Slept with my BF on date 3, which was less than a week after I met him (online dating). We also had four dates in the first week! He's moving in this weekend so worked out pretty well so far Grin

I think it's just when you both feel comfortable. We got close on date 2 but something was stopping me, so I respected that gut feel and he respected my no. Date 3 was a hell yes, and that's how you want it to be! We both find sex important in relationships though - some people don't so much. Build up is fun too though! Just enjoy it all!

ShimmeringSheen · 12/02/2022 13:41

@Shinydiscoballs1

It's not how I expected it to work out! I posted a thread last week about how long do you give it if you don't fancy someone straight away as I was so worried about this date. We connected straight away and get in so well, I've enjoyed his company ever since and now I'm really feeling the physical lust as its sometimes a slower build for me. I don't have any tips as this is all new to me and I just want to get it right. I was just myself and I think he was too and we seem to match pretty well (so far...) I'd literally love to ride him all night but I'm also one for rushing into things and then wishing I'd just chilled out a bit.
I love your comment that you'd literally love to ride him all night! Grin

When are you seeing him again? How old are you both?

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